Monthly Archives: January 2011

A Controversial Essay And A Variety Of Responses

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DISCUSS: ARE CHINESE MOTHERS BETTER PARENTS?

A Controversial Essay And A Variety Of Responses

By Eric Messinger

via A Controversial Essay And A Variety Of Responses.

“Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom” certainly has received much press this week and criticism is surrounding the author and her book.

Whether you agree or not with “Chinese Parenting” in my opinion, it is always interesting to read about how other cultures view parenting and the parent-child relationship.

A book like this one should make you question some of the things that you do as a parent and perhaps give  you a deeper understanding of why you adhere to certain beliefs about how parenting should be done.

Criticism is good when it stimulates more questions and answers. It is an effort in futility when it merely stands alone.

“Chinese Parenting” continued…

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“Chinese Parenting”….the discussion continues

Dear Asian America: Forget Chua’s Book, This is Our.

Here is a response to the discussion of “Chinese Parenting”.

The discussion continues…

Remember it is always a good thing to examine different views as it helps us as parents to evaluate what we are doing with our children and why we are doing it.

Chinese Parenting….

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Noteworthy Wednesday!

 

 

Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior – WSJ.com.

Chinese children will never:

• attend a sleepover

• have a playdate

• be in a school play

• complain about not being in a school play

• watch TV or play computer games

• choose their own extracurricular activities

• get any grade less than an A

• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama

• play any instrument other than the piano or violin

• not play the piano or violin.

via Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior – WSJ.com.

Have you ever wondered why Asian children excel in academics and music?
Well, there is an emphasis on academics and the performing arts which is unlike the emphasis on sports and other activities which is often seen in “Western” parenting.
According to the Wall Street Journal article….Chinese parents “understand that nothing is fun until you are good at it”.
In order to be good at something you have to work at it hence you must practice piano if you are to be good at it…you must practice writing if you are to be a good writer. We all know that children rarely like to practice so if this practicing is going to happen the parents must override the child’s desire to do something else.
It seems that if you are not permitted television or computer games nor can you choose your own extracurricular activities and cannot have a play-date or be in a school play then there is not much else to do but study, read and practice the violin and piano which are the chosen instruments in this culture.
Chinese parents according to the WSJ article use shaming if a child is disrespectful by actually calling their child “garbage”. According to the author, she knew what her parents meant and such criticism did not damage her self esteem. She attributes this to the fact that she was always given much praise for her accomplishments for her tenacious practice and her excellent academics. This is what built her confidence. When a child excels in a not so fun activity…it makes the activity fun in the long run. Now the parent has succeeded in getting the child to work even more.

The author goes on to point out three major differences between Chinese and Western parents.

  • Western parents are very concerned with their child’s self -esteem and try to reassure their children no matter how they perform. They view their child’s psyche as fragile where Chinese parents do not. Chinese parents will use “shaming” and assume that their child is strong enough to take and thus improve upon their performance.
  • Western parents do not believe for the most part that their children owe them anything, whereas the Chinese parents believe their children owe them everything possibly based on Confucian piety.
  • Chinese parents believe that they know what is best for their children. This is why they make choices for them. Western parents sometimes feel this way but tend to acknowledge the child’s preferences.

The author makes a final statement which really summarizes it all:

“Western parents try to respect their children’s individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions, supporting their choices, and providing positive reinforcement and a nurturing environment. By contrast, the Chinese believe that the best way to protect their children is by preparing them for the future, letting them see what they’re capable of, and arming them with skills, work habits and inner confidence that no one can ever take away.”

Baby Strollers…best picks.

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Baby Strollers

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/5I9AT1/www.babble.com/products/baby-products/best-stroller-baby-jogger-pram-lightweight-jogging/

If you are in the market for a baby stroller this is the link for you.

It describes some of the most popular strollers.

Happy reading and shopping it is a very important purchase.

If you actually want to see some of these and live in Chicagoland check out GIGGLE and GALT TOYS.

News Moms Need » Blog Archive » Birth defects prevention

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News Moms Need » Blog Archive » Birth defects prevention.

January 2011 is National Birth Defects Prevention Month.  This year’s theme is Medication Use Before, During, and After Pregnancy.

While most birth defects cannot be prevented because their causes are not known, women can take a number of steps before and during pregnancy to reduce their risk. These steps include taking a multivitamin containing 400 micrograms of folic acid daily starting before pregnancy and in early pregnancy. This helps to prevent serious birth defects of the brain and spinal cord, including spina bifida, and may also help prevent heart defects. Another step is getting a pre-pregnancy check up and making sure that the medications you are taking are safe to use during pregnancy.

Talk with your health care provider and pharmacist about your medications.  For the most current information about medications (prescription or over-the-counter), drugs, vaccines, chemical or environmental agents and their potential risks, we suggest that you contact a Teratology Information Service (TIS).  A teratogen is any agent or substance that can affect fetal development.  To answer questions properly, it is sometimes necessary to know how far along in her pregnancy a woman was when she came in contact with the substance, what medications she was taking at the time, some of her medical history, etc.  Trained professionals in the field of teratogens can answer your specific questions while maintaining your anonymity. They also can tell you if a medication is safe to use while breastfeeding. The national toll-free phone number to call is 866-626-6847.

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This entry was posted on Friday, January 7th, 2011 at 11:38 am and is filed under Planning for Baby, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

More on Vaccines and Autism from “March of Dimes”

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More information on this very important topic…if you have been plagued by questions of whether or not to vaccinate your children being informed may help you make this very important decision regarding the health of your child.

Vaccines and autism

http://newsmomsneed.marchofdimes.com/?p=8726

As you undoubtedly have seen in the news lately, the controversy around vaccines, particularly the MMR vaccine, and a possible link toautism is yet again a hot topic.  We reported last February that The Lancet, the journal that originally printed Dr. Andrew Wakefield’s 1998 original study that implicated vaccines as a cause of autism, had issued a complete retraction after finding several elements of the research were flawed. This week, the British Medical Journal and investigator Brian Deer uncovered “clear evidence of falsification” of Wakefield’s data, which studied only 12 children.

Dr. Wakefield’s research has been questioned for years, and the ethics violations that have come to light are further sad indications that vaccines do not cause autism. As reported previously, the courts and several large-scale studies since have found no evidence of any link.

There are many children suffering from autism and other health disorders. More research must be done to find the cause and cure of this and other health conditions affecting children. One might say that sadly, well over a decade of time, energy, funding and other resources has been spent embroiled in the vaccine controversy. Others, however, feel that Dr. Wakefield’s publication created intense focus on one possible cause of the complex problem of autism, a condition that greatly needs scientific research.  Hopefully, future efforts will be more productive.

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This entry was posted on Thursday, January 6th, 2011 at 1:40 pm and is filed under Baby, Hot Topics. You can follow any responses to this entry through theRSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

Fetal Movement: Fetal Kick Counts

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Noteworthy Wednesday!!!
Keeping track of fetal movements is a good way to make sure your baby’s doing OK. Learn how to count kicks and find out why this can be an important part of your pregnancy.
This is a good article on “Kick Counts” from an excellent site that offers good information to expecting parents as well as providing many answers to questions after the baby arrives.

Children and Fitness

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This is a great piece from “Big City Moms” concerning fitness for children.

“Big City Moms” is a wonderful resource for parenting especially for anyone living in the NYC area. You are really missing something if you do not check it out and join their Facebook page.

Fitness Ideas for Your Child

Robin Saks Frankel and James Christie

SocRoc
When you want to get your child exercising the most important goal is to have fun! Smile, laugh, act goofy, create storylines and get excited along with your kid. Children learn by watching and mirroring what you do. If you can teach your preschooler even one of the following movements it will be well worth it. Not only will you be improving their coordination, balance and posture you will also be developing great fitness habits which can last a lifetime.

1. The Airplane. This game is great for developing posture since the emphasis is on the lower and upper back.  Have your little one lie face down and ask them to put arms out to the side like they have wings. Then ask her to lift up her arms and legs and balance on her belly for five seconds. Create a storyline and add sound effects: “Ok sweetie we are  going to go flying. Waaaay up in the sky like an airplane-Ready? Liftoff and we are Flying! ”
Aim for 3- 5 repetitions.
2. Kick a Ball. A soccer ball, volleyball or beach ball is ideal. But any type of ball that isn’t too hard. Have your child kick the ball to you or try having them aim for a small goal. You can use any type of marker for a goal, like aiming between a pair of shoes or into an open duffle bag. Gently guide him to kick the middle of the ball with the top of their foot (where their shoelaces are) with his toes pointed down. You want to encourage him not to kick with the ball with his toes. Cheer like crazy and give a great big hug after a successful kick. Get excited and say” Goaoooooool!!! .”You did it!! You did it” when he scores.

The only thing worse than being stuck indoors because it’s a searing, hot, humid mess outside is being stuck indoors with a toddler and a baby because it’s a searing, hot, humid mess outside.  I have a two and a half year old and a 10 month old and lately it’s been a major challenge to find some weekend activities we can actually do. The playground is only a great option if it’s below 90, otherwise it’s just too hot and my kids both take afternoon naps so all-day excursions aren’t really an option for us. We’ve gone to the Children’s Museum and the American Museum of Natural History umpteen times which takes care of the morning but come post-nap time we are all going a little stir-crazy.  The key to keeping my kids happy in those few hours between the afternoon nap and bedtime is having some physical activity. But when it’s too hot to run around outdoors and most indoor playgyms are closed on weekend afternoons we need to get inspired. I’m about as creative as a lump of dirt so I sought professional advice.

James Christie, a former professional soccer player and Certified Fitness Trainer for kids and adults runs the kids’ Soccer and Fitness program SocRoc in New York City.

He gave me a list of six great ways to keep my kids moving, even if we’re stuck indoors.

-Robin Saks Frankel

Fitness Ideas for your Child-Ages 2-4 years old

When you want to get your child exercising the most important goal is to have fun! Smile, laugh, act goofy, create storylines and get excited along with your kid. Children learn by watching and mirroring what you do. If you can teach your preschooler even one of the following movements it will be well worth it. Not only will you be improving their coordination, balance and posture you will also be developing great fitness habits which can last a lifetime.

1. The Airplane. This game is great for developing posture since the emphasis is on the lower and upper back.  Have your little one lie face down and ask them to put arms out to the side like they have wings. Then ask her to lift up her arms and legs and balance on her belly for five seconds. Create a storyline and add sound effects: “Ok sweetie we are  going to go flying. Waaaay up in the sky like an airplane-Ready? Liftoff and we are Flying! “
Aim for 3- 5 repetitions. 2. Kick a Ball. A soccer ball, volleyball or beach ball is ideal. But any type of ball that isn’t too hard. Have your child kick the ball to you or try having them aim for a small goal. You can use any type of marker for a goal, like aiming between a pair of shoes or into an open duffle bag. Gently guide him to kick the middle of the ball with the top of their foot (where their shoelaces are) with his toes pointed down. You want to encourage him not to kick with the ball with his toes. Cheer like crazy and give a great big hug after a successful kick. Get excited and say” Goaoooooool!!! .”You did it!! You did it” when he scores. 3. Animal Fitness.  Have your child imitate his favorite animal’s movements. Try:  Running fast and roaring like a tiger. Walking slow like a elephant and swing your arms like a trunk . Flapping your wings like a butterfly. Hopping  like a bunny rabbit and using your fingers to make bunny ears. Crawl like a puppy dog and wag your tails. The possibilities are endless. You might have better luck with a 3 and 4 year old playing this game but give it a try with a younger child anyway. It can’t hurt and you will get some good exercise demonstrating different animal movements. 4. Musical Fitness. Have a dance party in your home.  Get your child walking, running and dancing to his favorite songs. Nothing is more effective then music when it comes to getting your child moving. One game that I’ve found effective is setting up a circle with cones as markers.I have the kids run around the circle to music and when the music stops, the kids have to  stop or sit down. Eventually you can progress up to running in and out of the cones by zigzagging or hopping over the markers like bunny rabbits or kangaroos. Give it a try!

5. Stand on one leg. The focus here is on balance, coordination and core strength. If your child is under 3 years old you may have to support him and hold his 
arms. Have your child stand on one leg for 3-5 seconds at a time and ask them to suck in their belly button for balance. Make it fun by demonstrating what happens when you lose y our balance or don’t suck in your tummy.  Say “Whoa!” and “Don’t fall down, suck in that belly.” while swaying back and forth and pretending to lose your balance.  Believe me, kids love it. 6. Pushups. It’s never too early to strengthen the upper body and anyone can
do a pushup, you just have to modify them for the younger set. Have your child
get on all fours with her knees about 6-12 inches from their hands. Ask her to bend her arms and lower her chest and torso a couple of inches from the ground and then push back up.  Aim for about 3-5 repetitions. Make sure you cheer like crazy each time and give a great big hug after they have finished.

James Christie is a Former Professional Soccer Player and a Certified Fitness Trainer for kids and adults. He runs the Popular Soccer and Fitness program SocRoc in New York City for kids ages 2 thru 14 years old. James would be happy to provide a free trial SocRoc class for your child in Central Park or at one of SocRoc’s indoor locations. Please call or Email James with any Soccer-Fitness questions.917-703-0409 or jcsocroc@gmail.com WWW.JCSOCROC.COM