Parents, Are You Sick of Parenting Tips Yet?

Parents  Are You Sick of Parenting Tips Yet?

At any given moment, I have a pile of parenting information on my desk, nightstand, and kitchen table.

I have my favorite tipsters and I also have my favorite tip.

parents

Make your primary goal as parents

to help your child develop empathy and

kindness in their hearts

 rather

than focusing on controlling his/her behavior.

Raising a child does not come down to following a list of tips. Parenting and grand-parenting really stems from the heart. It has to do with treating children with respect and empathy which is sometimes easier imagined than accomplished. Children imitate their parents and we often hear our own words come out of their mouths sometimes to our embarrassment.

If your goal is to have a well-behaved child with core qualities of kindness and empathy, you will need to encourage him to appropriately express his thoughts and emotions while listening and using these moments to treat him with empathy and kindness.

What do you think? How do you encourage your child to express himself?

 

Weekend Picks from ParentingintheLoop

Weekend Picks from Parenting in the Loop

Here are my favorites for this week. I cannot believe that in two weeks it will be

Labor Day Weekend. Where did the summer go?weekend picks

I Am “The Good Wife” circa 1955 in Spirit | Today’s Grandmum

What a fascinating funny article that first appeared in 1955 when I was a child! Was this really what was expected of women in those days? Here is what I remember as a little girl from that era.

The Best Way to Put Baby to Sleep

If you want a restful night’s sleep and you have a baby you might find this helpful. Everyone’s baby is different but there are some things that can definitely help a baby to self soothe and actually become a good sleeper. A rested baby will help make your weekend more restful.

Dr. Judith Owens, a pediatrician who is the director of sleep medicine at Boston Children’s Hospital, told me that she would focus here on what she termed “sleep onset associations.” That is, on helping the children learn how to fall asleep independently at bedtime, which should then generalize to an ability to fall asleep when they wake in the night. So it’s lovely to use the song at bedtime as a going-to-bed routine, but it’s important that the actual moment of going to sleep should be after the bottle (and ideally, after brushing teeth after the bottle) and after the song. It may be that the baby who wakes and cannot soothe himself is actually falling asleep with the aid of the bottle and the song, and then finds himself without those props in the middle of the night. “What they want to do is clearly demarcate the soothing intervention on the part of the parents, the song and the bottle from the actual act of falling asleep,” Dr. Owens said. That probably means moving the routines a little earlier, so that after the song is done, the babies get to fall asleep by themselves. And that, in turn, probably means some difficult nights. You can separate the twins for this transition period if you want, or keep them together; whatever you think would make it easier. Co-sleeping — unless it’s something you believe in and want to practice over the long term — may just leave you with another sleep problem to solve down the line. But you want to get through this to a new equilibrium where you can all enjoy the song and the bedtime ritual. “Learning to self-soothe in regard to sleep is a real developmental skill,” Dr. Owens said. “It can be taught, and it’s an important milestone in self-regulation.” Do you have a health question? Submit your question to Ask Well.

Source: Ask Well: The Best Way to Put Babies to Sleep – The New York Times

Should you salt your child’s food?

A really good question since your child will be eating salt in various foods for a very long time. How young can a child start eating table salt on his food? Admittedly, I do not add salt to anything I make for my almost year old grandson and although the veggies, meats and starches taste very good unsalted they just might have a bit more of an enticing flavor with some added salt. I was happy to see this post in the NYT which helped me with my dilemma.

Is it safe to add salt to a 5-year-old’s food? Reader Question • 175 votes A Yes, in moderation. High salt intake is linked with an increased risk of high blood pressure, and the American Heart Association and other groups recommend that children limit sodium intake to 1,500 to 2,300 milligrams a day (a teaspoon of salt contains about 2,300 milligrams of sodium). But kids typically get far more than that, usually from restaurant fare and processed foods, which account for 77 percent of the sodium in Americans’ diets. “

Source: Should You Salt a Child’s Food? – The New York Times

Have a good weekend everyone and enjoy some moments of gratitude.

Already August and Back to School

August and Back to School…Already?

back to school

I don’t know about you all but my summer has flown by with many changes happening at a whirlwind pace in my home.

Change is never easy and some are much more emotionally draining than others. Because of the turmoil in which I found myself posts on this blog have been few and far between.

As most of you know I am very close to my granddaughter who is now 8 years old. I welcomed her into the world 8 years ago this month. She was the inspiration of Parenting in the Loop. She and I have a very special relationship for which I am ever grateful. What a breath of fresh air she is and it has been God’s blessing for me to be able to watch and share in her life. As my first grandchild, she introduced me to the joy of being a grandparent. Words do not measure up to the feelings of this stage of my life.

Last year, my younger daughter had a little boy. He will be one in a few short days and I have recently shared an extended visit with him which has been joyful.

The huge change that has taken place in the last week is that my older daughter and granddaughter have relocated to California and my younger daughter, grandson and husband have relocated to Chicago and are staying with us while they settle into their new home away from the Rhode Island that they love.

Sending my daughter and granddaughter off to California was an emotional rollercoaster  for me. She and I talked about moving and watched the Disney film “Inside Out” several times, which helped us share our happy and sad feelings in a very real way. My granddaughter surprised me with the ease that she was able to relate to the movie and express her own feelings concerning her move to California. She understood that she would be sad as would I but that we would have “The Invisible String” keeping us attached even though we would be a 4 hour plane flight away from each other.

When a child moves, changing schools is usually an anxiety producing experience. Leaving family is one thing but leaving friends and their school along with the familiar teachers and staff can really play havoc with a child’s adjustment to their new environment.

My granddaughter’s new school will be similar to the one she leaves behind. It is a small Catholic school with uniforms so fitting in with the fashion code will not be an enormous issue. But there will be back packs, lunch boxes and various sundries to choose which will help her individual personality showcase itself.

We love “Cool Mom Picks “Back to School Guide 2016 and rely on it for quality and consistently great choices for these “BTS” necessities. I am always amazed at the wonderful changes in lunch boxes that encourage parents and kids to pack some really healthy and interesting lunches and snacks.

I loved helping my daughter with lunch decisions and back to school choices for my granddaughter over the last couple of years. Because she has a nut allergy food choices are VERY important. We enjoyed Planet Lunchbox which kept everything fresh and reduced our carbon footprint. Momables from Laura Fuentes provided seemingly endless variety to my granddaughter’s lunch choices and rotation.

 

Back to SchoolWe’ve found 34 of the coolest lunch boxes and bags for kids — whether you love packing them every day or not.

Source: 34 of the coolest lunch boxes and bags | Back to School Guide 2016 | Cool Mom Picks

Childproofing away from home

 

Childproofing When You Are Away From Home

childproofingSmall children are at risk for accidents especially at home since that is where they spend  the most time. There are all kinds of services and ways to go about making a child’s environment safe and providing a play area that is welcoming and worry free.

What about when you go away to a relative’s home or to a hotel, that safe environment is sometimes more challenging to acquire.

I just came across this video which is so helpful for those parents traveling during these summer months or actually anytime. Here is Childproofing 101!

Here’s to a safe summer for everyone including your littlest travelers who are curious and ready to explore everything that is new and different!

Here’s how to spot potential dangers when away from home and what to pack in your safety kit.

Source: Childproofing away from home | Video | BabyCenter

Parenting in the Loop Weekend Pics

 

Parenting in the Loop Weekend Pics

Mindful Parenting

The Fourth of July Weekend is upon us. So how about some outdoor play. The New York Times has this wonderful suggestion from its pages with a great reference to “Mindful Parenting” by my friend Kristin Race.

Why be intentional about this most relaxed of times? Summer goes by so fast. One minute, it’s June, and we have all the time in the world for ice cream, drive-in movies and bike rides. The next, it’s August, and too often, we’re left wondering where it went. We want to avoid regrets over missed opportunities. Every week, we’ll offer research-based suggestions for ways to set this season apart from the rest of the year.

“Kids who are used to more structured activities may not know how to create these things on their own,” said Kristen Race, a psychologist and the author of “Mindful Parenting.”

Source: The ‘Intentional Summer’ Challenge: Play an Outdoor Game – The New York Times

weekend summer fun

 

Questions about sunscreen for kids of all ages ….check out this link to help you decide what is best for your kiddos.

The skin is the largest organ of the body, proportionally larger in the smallest children, and protecting it properly needs our care and attention.
Source: Sunscreen and Bug Spray: Children’s Summer Skin Care – The New York Times

 

sleeping Colin

Getting enough sleep these days as parents? Probably not!

What are your baby’s sleep onset associations? Check out this post from the NYT and set yourself up for success when getting your baby to sleep on his own. Why not start this weekend?

Dr. Judith Owens, a pediatrician who is the director of sleep medicine at Boston Children’s Hospital, told me that she would focus here on what she termed “sleep onset associations.” That is, on helping the children learn how to fall asleep independently at bedtime, which should then generalize to an ability to fall asleep when they wake in the night. So it’s lovely to use the song at bedtime as a going-to-bed routine, but it’s important that the actual moment of going to sleep should be after the bottle (and ideally, after brushing teeth after the bottle) and after the song.
Source: Ask Well: The Best Way to Put Babies to Sleep – The New York Times

Nothing like a three day weekend to mark the beginning of summer.

Make it a safe one!

Weekend Picks from Parenting in the Loop

Weekend Picks from Parenting in the Loop

Summer is full of celebrations it seems, especially when the weather is warm.

We all find it a bit easier to be playful and somewhat carefree when the the sun shines and the days are longer.

So here are my picks for some weekend reads.

Enjoy!

Friends and family get together during the summer and our children are meeting all sorts of “relatives” that they may or may not know. Take a cue from them how affectionate they want to be to these “strangers”.

Weekend VisitsAs we head into the vacation season and into visits with grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, there’s one awkward situation that will arise in many families that most parents will be unprepared to deal with: relatives who expect hugs and kisses from little ones — even when those little ones don’t want to show them affection. To spare a relative’s feelings, many of us will urge a small child to endure or even return this unwanted physical contact. But should we? What messages are we sending to our kids about their body boundaries when we do this?

Source: Why Your Child Should Never Be Forced to Hug a Relative | POPSUGAR Moms

Trying to teach your child coding and introducing them to STEM activities is easier than you think.

kids-activities-to-learn-computer-coding-without-computers

Computer coding is essentially a language that computer uses. When we think about helping kids learn computer coding, we automatically think we need a computer first. But in fact, there are many ways to learn computer coding without a computer, as many thinking and coding approach can be learned in many different activities off-screen. Today we share some off-screen activities that teach kids computer coding.

Source: 11 Kids Activities to Learn Coding without a Computer | iGameMom

Father’s Day is here and DIY gifts are great for the little ones to give to Dad. Here are some suggestions Cool Mom Picks.

diy-fathers-day-gifts-photo-gift-tags-bloomdesigns_zpsuxzfqyxd

24 wonderful DIY Father’s Day gifts, crafts + printables
Posted on June 17, 2016
DIY Father’s Day gifts are always so special, especially from the youngest kids. (Once we hit voting age or so, those handprint mugs just don’t really cut it in the same way, huh.) So for our next installment of our 2016 Father’s Day Gift

Source: 24 wonderful DIY Father’s Day gifts, crafts + printables

Mindfulness Might Help in the Aftermath of Orlando

Mindfulness Might Help

Mindfulness

Sunrise

Orlando, Paris, Sandy Hook….my mind cannot embrace all the recent violence and the extreme sadness that it causes so many people that I don’t even personally know.

As a parent and grandparent I am concerned for the future and wish I could change the past painful events and I look for ways to rid myself of the feelings of fear of the future and repossess some of the casualness of my younger self.

Today I am reading thoughts from blogger friends who have a way with words and are suffering too as they ponder the future and how to prepare themselves and their families for so many uncertainties.

I would like to share some thoughts on meditation which has helped me out in times of stress.

Mindfulness is one way to ease our thoughts and stresses and allow ourselves to live in the “Now” which helps us to have moments where our mind is quieted even for a minute of meditation. Anyone can do meditation and it can be done almost anywhere, although I would not recommend doing it while you are driving.

In an effort to offer what I can to help in this time of upheaval here is a link to a simple but an effective way to practice some mindfulness in you day.

 

According to spiritual teacher Jeff Foster:

Regret is the longing to change the past. Fear is the desire to control the future. Peace is the surrender to Now.

 

Surrender to Now. How do we surrender to Now? We accept what is and we move ahead. Surrender doesn’t mean we approve or like what is happening. It means we focus on solutions instead of problems – what can we DO? WE can take action with love and peace. We can become active in the causes we support. We can spread joy and love and peace in our home, among our friends, in our community. To do this we must be mindful. Here are three ways to find mindfulness even in the most stressful times.:

Source: Three Ways to Find Mindfulness Today | You Know Neen

Mom 2.0 Again…Dana Point, California

Greetings from MOM 2.0!

A great place to be right now listening to the surf and watching the ebb and flow of the tide!

The sea is so relaxing and it has always been my happy place!

Mom 2.0 The Ritz Carlton, Dana Point CaliforniaI am one lucky grandmother to be here at Mom 2.0! This year it is here at the Ritz Carlton, Dana Point, California. The venue is spectacular and only adds to the excitement of being at this fabulous conference.

It was somewhat touch and go getting to Laguna from Chicago yesterday due to family responsibilities but it was wonderful to finally finally lay my head on on my pillow here at the hotel after a marathon day which began at 4:30 a.m. Tuesday in Chicago and ended at 11:30 p.m. here near Laguna Beach.

For the next couple of days I will be surrounded by some very interesting mothers grandmothers, dads and so many other wonderful people who will continue to inspire me.

Join me for Mom 2.0 here in California!

 

Parenting in Loop Weekend Picks

Parenting in the Loop Weekend Picks

Welcome to a warm Sunday here in Chicago.

Our daughter and her baby made it here without any delays last weekend and are enjoying themselves and so am I. How lucky we are to have our little grandson grinning at us in person rather than on FaceTime.

The Pockit Stroller was a huge success as a must with a baby, especially when you are traveling alone. He was also super on the plane which was a huge relief.

There were so many good reads on my feed this week! It was difficult to pick just three but here goes.

Do you have to give up “your creative self” when you become a parent? Or does the creativity get woven into the the new fabric of your life.

A portrait of the artist as a young mom.

 

Source: Is Parenthood the Enemy of Creative Work? — The Cut

weekend talks

An in-depth exploration of the menstrual cycle and the difference between training bras and sports bras at this age wasn’t part of my Master Parenting Plan.

Puberty Girl visits our home frequently these days. She’s 13 years old, and she wears a bra, smears deodorant under her arms and drags a razor across her legs. She gets her period, and frequently changes her pad or knots a sweatshirt around her waist to cover up an unsightly stain.

My 5-year old daughter created Puberty Girl. The juicy details of adolescence have also captured the attention of my 7-year-old, but she has yet to create an imaginary representation of her curiosity.

This weekend read is just so interesting as it deals with a topic that so many parents dread and have difficulty with as their children get older but how young is too young for this discussion?

Source: How a social worker ended up talking to her young daughters about puberty – The Washington Post

My wishes to you all for a somewhat relaxing Sunday…the weekend is almost over. It simply goes to fast for me!

Parenting in the Loop Weekend Picks

Parenting in the Loop Weekend Picks

My daughter is traveling with her 7 month old son this week and although the Safety 1st Step and Go stroller she uses all the time is wonderful she wants to travel lighter. So I was on a mission to find her the smallest stroller with a good price point for my budget! Thanks to my favorite baby gear go to person Jamie Grayson aka “The Baby Guy NYC” I was able to locate the Pockit Stroller.

weekend at Gearapalooza with The Baby Guy NYC

The Baby Guy NYC

Once I found out the stroller on The Baby Guy NYC, my second problem was shipping it over night. Thank you Pish Posh Baby for making it so easy to get the exact stroller delivered overnight to my daughter for her travel this weekend.

The process of finding an awesome stroller that is right for your family is often times accompanied with feelings of overwhelm. We often hear parents complain and ask:

Source: How You Can Pick Out an Awesome Stroller for Your Family – The PishPoshBaby Blog

Organization is the buzz word these days and moms look at other moms and do the inevitable comparisons.  This post came through my feed and I thought it was a great one to share.

Mom-Finds-Out-Her-Baby-Named-After-Ex-Girlfriend

 

We all have a mom in our lives whose level of “togetherness” we secretly (or not so secretly) envy. She shows up at school drop-off looking like she was dressed by a stylist and had time for a blowout, has no problem chairing a fundraiser on a whim, and has a successful day job, too. There are two truths that this mom would love for you to know: #1 No one has it all together, even her, and #2 She’s got a few tricks up her sleeve. While we can’t tell you the last thing that caused her to melt down or lose her cool, we do know a few reasons that there seem to be more hours in her day than everyone else’s. Here’s the scoop on how to channel your most organized self:

 

Source: Things Organized Moms Do | POPSUGAR Moms

What is better than a weekend birthday party?

I am a big fan of Beverly Cleary books and in celebration of her 100th birthday I am featuring this post! Happy Birthday dear Beverly!

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On April 12, Beverly Cleary will be eating a slice of carrot cake in honor of her 100th birthday. While the talented author might not be going all out for the occasion, anyone can celebrate by picking up one of her beloved books that have the power to

Source: Most Popular Beverly Cleary Books For Kids | POPSUGAR Moms

Here’s to a nice weekend everyone!