Category Archives: Family

TGIF-Weekend Reading….

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Weekend Reading:

Weekend Sunrise

Weekend Sunrise

After a gloomy “warmish” in the 30’s week here in Chicago, I am ready for the weekend, along with a Friday night dinner with friends and a wishful but unlikely “rest filled” Saturday and Sunday and perhaps a sunrise like this one!

This essay from the back page of the Sunday Times Magazine is a nice read. I don’t know about you all, but I grew up in a large city that I hated, Yonkers, NY. Long ago, it was known as the “City of Gracious Living,” but to me, that never mattered. Thank goodness, it was right next to New York City, which was in my mind Yonkers’ only redeeming quality.

 

As we drove off, I was grateful for what Tujunga was for me: a hometown I wanted so desperately to leave, but that taught me to work for the ticket that would take me away.

“Free Range” parents, who allow their children freedom to walk to school at a young age are coming under fire not only on social media but also from local law enforcement and children’s protective services in some areas of the country.  Are you a “free range” or a “helicopter” parent?

 

Kids go to the park every day. But it’s not everyday the cops come calling because kids are spotted there, but that’s exactly what happened to the Meitiv family recently.

 

“We’re amazed this has become a national conversation because we’re just doing what our parents did or [what] was considered perfectly normal just one generation ago,” said Danielle Meitiv, who was investigated on two occasions by Child Protective Services (CPS) in Maryland after allowing her children, aged 6 and 10, to walk to and from school and the local playground alone.

 

As a nursing professional, who worked in labor and delivery, I am not a fan of home births. While I understand why moms would opt for this opportunity, I would not for just the reasons that appear in this mom’s story and post from Yummy Mummy Club.

 

Martin’s feelings are absolutely valid and an upsetting birth experience can have lasting effects on a mother and her family. But it’s wrong to scare women from wanting to go this route, because that decision is one which should come from research and discussion, not fear – one way or another. A certified, licensed midwife is a health care professional and they understand birthing risk. We can plan and hope for the best, but also be keenly aware (as I was throughout the labour) that it could easily go the other way, through no fault of our own. –

You probably notice that two topics above are from Yummy Mummy Club, which is one of my personal favorite sites. I follow YMC on Facebook and enjoy many of their posts. Go ahead and check them out!

Have a great weekend everyone! 🙂

Early Pregnancy – 6 Weeks

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Early Pregnancy-6 Weeks

Pregnancy 6 weeks

Your baby is the size of a “lentil”.

 

Major developments during your 6th week of pregnancy:

  • Nose mouth and ears are beginning to take shape
  • There are dark spots where your baby’s eyes will be
  • Baby’s heart is beating 100-160 per minute,
  • Intestines are developing
  • New tissue that will become baby’s lungs is present
  • Baby’s pituitary gland is forming along with the rest of his brain, muscles and bones.
  • Baby is only 1/4 inch long

Quick Clicks:

Infections cannot always be avoided but there are ways to help limit your exposure.

  • Good hand washing
  • Not sharing glasses or utensils
  • Not cleaning cat litter
  • Gloves on when gardening
  • Staying away from anyone with a contagious disease
  • Avoiding food borne infections
  • Washing fruits and vegetable
  • Thoroughly cook meat, fish and eggs
  • Clean kitchen work surfaces

Personally you may feel emotionally labile, one day you are moody and maybe even sad the next day joy filled …this is somewhat normal. The emotional fluctuations are caused by hormones that are changing during pregnancy. You may also be thinking about how your life is changing along with your body and that can cause anyone to be emotional.

Spotting can be relatively common at this stage. Up to 25% of women experience this. It can be normal but it can also be a sign of a miscarriage. If you have any spotting or bleeding call your healthcare practitioner or go to the emergency room immediately.

By now, you are probably taking prenatal vitamins. Sometimes, they can be the cause of stomach upset. Many pregnant moms have this problem with their vitamins, including this writer, If this happens, check with your doctor or midwife. There are chewable vitamins that might work better for you during pregnancy.

Video-Fetal development weeks 1-9 

  BabyCenter.

Early Pregnancy – 5 Weeks

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Early Pregnancy- 5 Weeks

Pregnancy Week5Sesame_424x302

Your baby embryo is about the size of a sesame seed at 5 weeks and looks more like a tadpole.

But despite how tiny your baby is, there is rapid growth continuing to happen. The heart is taking shape and beginning to beat. Wow!

Fetal development video weeks 1 through 9 

Some  pregnancy related discomforts:

  • sore breasts (wear a sports bra for comfort even when sleeping)
  • fatigue
  • frequent urination
  • nausea

Things to do for healthy pregnancy:

  • do not drink alcohol
  • continue exercising or begin to exercise with your health practitioner’s approval
  • see how your partner can participate in the months ahead
  • talk to your family about health history that might affect your baby or your pregnancy.
  • make sure your home and job are environmentally safe places (cleaning products, lead, fumes)
  • quit smoking
  • make a prenatal appointment
  • start taking prenatal vitamins

 

 

TGIF-Weekend Reading….

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Weekend Reading!

bicycle in snow...maybe not this weekend

My picks for weekend reading after another cold week here in Chicago. The weekend looks like we will get a January thaw, you just might want to get outside or read these posts?

Daphne Brogdon is a blogger, blogger who also does stand-up comedy. She now has a gig on the Food Network, Daphne Dishes. Here is post about some of my conversation with her this week.

 

Today, I had the pleasure of enjoying a conference call with her. She answered questions about how she combines both worlds of blogging and cooking and how she came to the place where she is now with her own show Daphne Dishes on the Food Network.

Friends are precious and good friends are few, at least that has been my experience. What happens when a friend’s spouse dies or their child dies? How does your friendship change?

 

Friends are mostly a source of joy for me but as I get older I am finding that the more joy a friend brings me the more difficult it is when a friendship changes or ends.

Ringing in a New Year after the death of a spouse…how does one move on when the beloved is still inside you? One woman’s perspective:

 

So many of the men I meet on Match — the ones who are widowers, not those who are divorced — are still mourning the love of their life. She, their late wife, the mother of their children and grandmother of their children’s children, laughed at his jokes, travelled the world with him, comforted and warmed his bed at night. Now she is gone, never to return. After a while he feels the pull of the body’s biology and the heart’s longing, as do we all. “She” is not coming back, one must move on, so who else might there be, out there, he wonders, in the world-at-large?

So how does one move on, when the love of your life is gone, be it your husband or wife or another soul mate with whom you shared a life for many years or for several decades? In truth, you don’t move on; the beloved is still inside you. You just make room in your life for a new relationship, internally and externally, grateful to have had what you had, and grateful as well for the opportunity to care romantically for another human being before you “shuffle off this mortal coil.”

 

Here’s to a wonderful, warm weekend! Warm is relative!

Signs of Pregnancy

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Early signs of Pregnancy

pregnancy

You may have signs of being pregnant before you have even missed your period. Many women mistake these early signs for premenstrual since they are very similar.

  • At 5 weeks pregnant 50% of women had some symptoms of pregnancy.
  • At 6 weeks pregnant 70% of women had some by 6 weeks.
  • At 8 weeks pregnant 90% of women had some by 8 weeks.

The first sign of pregnancy is usually a missed period. The most common symptoms to follow are:

  • nausea,
  • vomiting,
  • fatigue,
  • frequent urination, and
  • breast tenderness and swelling.

These symptoms can be mild or severe.

Other signs of pregnancy that women reported by 8 weeks of pregnancy include:

  • Mild uterine cramping or discomfort (without bleeding)
  • Abdominal bloating
  • Constipation
  • Heartburn
  • Nasal congestion
  • Shortness of breath
  • Food cravings or aversions
  • Mood changes
  • Lightheadedness
  • Spider veins
  • Itchy palms
  • Increased skin pigmentation (on the face, linea alba, or breast areolas)
  • via Early pregnancy symptoms: What will I feel and when? | BabyCenter.

 

TGIF-Weekend Reading….

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Weekend Reading!

My picks for weekend reading

After an arctic cold week here in Chicago, I am really glad to see Friday and the weekend roll around, with the sun shining outside my window as I write this post. I am not letting the sun fool me – it is only 7 degrees outside with a below zero windchill of minus 11 degrees! Yikes!

I am going to post a picture that you can use for some meditation or as just a reminder of a more comfortable summer day on the water-my personal happy place!

Weekend

A Day at the Beach…Martha’s Vineyard

 

Seeking women over 50! Do you want to make a big change in 2015? Read this, it might help you with your resolution.

 

Dear Readers,

We’re seeking 15 women age 50 and older who plan to make a radical change in their lives in 2015. Whether your New Year’s resolution is to strike out on your own, reinvigorate your marriage, get healthy — through diet, exercise or something else — start a business, adopt a child, overcome a fear or learn a new skill in 2015, we want to hear from you. The aim is to create an inspiring initiative that reminds us it’s never too late to change your life, pursue your passion, or prioritize personal happiness and wellbeing over traditional definitions

 

How do kids organize and control their world. There is no gray for them, knowing this just might help you understand their behavior.

 

In fact, black-or-white thinking helps kids organize and control their world. As they put things into one of two categories – like or dislike, fun or boring – they make predictions about behaviors and situations. Being able to do this shows they can understand two very different ideas at the same time.

 

How are you going to find social connections as you get older? Do you respect the Virtual Village concept?

 

Then he ran across the idea of virtual retirement villages, whose members pay a yearly fee to gain access to resources and social connections that help them age in place. Sold on the concept, Mr. Cloud joined with some friends to start Capital City Village four years ago.

I hope you all have a warm and wonderful weekend!

Pregnancy Preparation-Reducing Anxiety

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Pregnancy

pregnancy

 

I am starting a series about pregnancy and over the next few months “Parenting in the Loop” will feature topics that are relevant to women, who are expecting a baby. Hopefully, parents and grandparents alike will find this series interesting.

Pregnancy can be a scary situation for both women and men, but this need not be so. Although it is a normal condition, for the first baby it is all new. New can be nerve wracking with all the physical and emotional changes that accompany the pregnant state of being.

If you are a planner then taking time to do some preconceive planning may actually be a stress reducer.

To erase some of the anxiety from this normal reaction of fear, some couples plan a preconception checklist. Preparing for pregnancy helps to squash some of the fears about situations that you actually do have some control over.

The March of Dimes has compiled a short list that might help with deciding if you are ready to become pregnant. You want to be in the best health that is normal for you.

Here we go:

Some items may or may not apply to you.

  • I’ve talked with my partner about having a baby.

It is important to for partners to be on the same page here. Support is essential.

  • I’ve stopped smoking, drinking alcohol and doing drugs.

Smoking, drinking alcohol and doing drugs is harmful for a growing fetus especially in the early days of pregnancy when you may or may not realize you are even pregnant.

  • I’ve started saving money for the baby.

Babies are costly. Having a little “cushion of cash” can help with expected  and unexpected expenses and decrease worry.

  • I’m taking a multivitamin with 400 mcg of folic acid in it every day.

Folic acid is an important vitamin for baby growth and development.

  • I’ve had a medical checkup before trying to get pregnant.

Being in your best health possible for you is a good start for any mom-to-be.

  • I’ve asked my provider about medicines I take.

All medications should be reviewed with your physician as many of them can cause deformities.

  • I’m at a healthy weight.

It would be good to be at a healthy weight or take care to weight manage during these nine months.

  • I know which maternity costs my insurance pays.

Having a baby can be costly, so a review of your insurance coverage would be helpful in managing expenses so that finances do not bring on more worries.

via Preconception checklist | Pregnancy | March of Dimes.

 

 

 

Another New Year…Another Chance at Full Catastrophe Living!

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Happy New Year!

Happy New Year

 

With the advent of a new year comes a new chance to do some of the stuff that I did not get to do last year. 

As a wife, mother, grandmother and blogger, my plate is mostly full. I love it that way.

It seems that as exhausting as my days are, when all is said and done, I enjoy them. This is especially evident when I fall into my bed at night and am asleep almost before my head hits the pillow.

We are lucky to have a full house, which includes myself, my husband and three dogs. With our daughter and granddaughter living nearby, unexpected visits make my day.

I like to think, I live what Zorba the Greek referred to as a “full catastrophe life”!

“Catastrophe here does not mean disaster. Rather it means the poignant enormity of our life experience. It includes crises and disaster but also all the little things that go wrong and that add up. The phrase reminds us that life is always in flux, that everything we think is permanent is actually only temporary and constantly changing. This includes our ideas, our opinions, our relationships, our jobs, our possessions, our creations, our bodies, everything.”

via Spirituality & Practice: Book Excerpt: Full Catastrophe Living, by Jon Kabat-Zinn.

 

To me, life is full of great happinesses alongside its trials and sadnesses, the yin and yang of what makes up all our lives. I am grateful that my days are not permanent or frozen in time.

Although there are definitely wonderful moments I would seriously like to last longer than they do, I know they will not. Another shoe will eventually drop. Always knowing that all moments are fleeting, my camera is never too far from me so I can capture and freeze frame a scene from my personal movie.

IMG_0297

Simply said, I love that every day is new and brings with it the expected and the unexpected. I love that each day has its own uniqueness. It makes me happy to know that when I go to sleep at night, the morning will dawn with a new sunrise and another opportunity to make a difference in the lives of those I love and those I come in contact with that day. My troubles of the past are one day farther away from me each and every morning. A wonderful thing!

Last week, over the New Year, I spent some time in my happy place, which is in Rhode Island. The spectacular views of the sunrises never cease to amaze me and make me smile. The ebb and flow of the tide makes me calm as does watching the ducks on their endless search for fish, along with the seagulls perched on the dock just waiting for a quick snack.

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The holidays are over and life is fast returning to the routine.

I look forward to setting my sails and living the full catastrophe life of the New Year 2015…what about you?

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Twenty Innocent Children…Don’t Forget Them

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Have You Hugged Your Children Today?

children

Tonight, I am reminded by my friend and fellow ChicagoNow blogger, Sheila Quirke, aka. Mary Tyler Mom that tomorrow marks two years since the horrific and violent tragedy at Sandy Hook. Twenty innocent children lost their young lives along with their teachers and others at school that day.

I am thinking of their families, their parents, siblings, grandparents and all those who knew and loved these little ones.

It makes me cry.

I can’t even imagine the utter pain that these families have suffered over the past two years and how they will continue to suffer from such a tragic loss.

Nothing is more devastating than the death of a child.

What continues to scare me to the core is the everyday violence that we have almost come to expect when turning on the news. It seems that each day since that violent shooting, there have been more and more gun related deaths.

It breaks my heart when I hear about another child that is an innocent victim of a shooting. Children should be safe in school and in their homes…they should be safe walking to and from their neighborhood school…they should be safe in playgrounds.

But sadly, they are not.

I have been following and supporting the work and progress of Sandy Hook Promise along with reading the shared stories by Daniel Barden’s dad.  Mark Barden writes so beautifully about his son, Daniel, who lost his life that day as a first grader in Newtown.

Mark Barden lovingly writes how Daniel was such a sensitive child especially when it came to the needs of others, I feel like I knew his gorgeous little boy with the beautiful smile.

I keep reading Mark’s emails and his stories, hoping against hope that somehow, some way this nightmare will go away.

It will not.

This is a “living nightmare” for Daniel’s family. However, through his sorrow, Mark and the other members of Sandy Hook Promise are trying to make a difference with their work surrounding gun control.

I support Sandy Hook Promise and I pray that others will support their work too. It will not bring back their little ones but it hopefully will prevent some other families from suffering a similar tragedy caused by someone with a gun.

Sheila has written a post at ChicagoNow that I recommend reading. It is not easy to ponder the events of this horrible day but if we do not remember our past we will be forced to repeat it.

Thank you Sheila for your thoughtful words.

Two years ago tonight, twenty families in Newtown, Connecticut tucked their first graders into bed for the very last time.  These children got on their pajamas, some of them might have bathed, they brushed their teeth, complaining about it, I imagine.  Their moms and dads might have read them books and sung them songs.  And then, for the very last time, they turned out the light and said. “Good night.”

via Read This Before You Tuck Your Children Into Bed Tonight | Mary Tyler Mom.

Holidays and Indulgent Grandparents…

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Grandparents and Gifts

grandparents

The holidays are almost here and gifts will be pouring in from relatives to your children especially well meaning grandparents. It can quickly get overwhelming for you as parents and your kids. This is not a good feeling.

What if anything do you do to control the amount and type of gifts your kids receive at Christmas and Hanukah?

Let’s assume that most grandparents are well meaning even though you may think that sometimes they have lost their minds when it comes to gift giving.

grandparents

If it is not too late, try to have a conversation with them about what your children would like for gifts and what actually might be some really great gifts. This is not always a comfortable conversation to have but if you sandwich your points between two positive comments, it can soften the discussion. You might begin a conversation by telling them how helpful they have been recently, being specific and then swing into the gift topic.

Always end discussions like this with another positive thought as it leaves the conversation with an upbeat feeling instead of a decree about how you are raising your children and what grandparents can and cannot give them as gifts. To me, it is a blessing to have a grandchild.

My motto here, is to be kind as you never know what kind of day your family members are dealing with…we all have our difficulties to negotiate each day.