Toddler’s Tantrums, Creative Children, Smarter than Adults

Parenting in the Loop Facebook

Janet Lansbury offers many insights into how to take care of your babies and children. She    is a follower of Magda Gerber and her RIE philosophy.

Here are some of my favorite posts from Janet, that recently came across my feed. I hope you enjoy them and realize that as a parent and grandparent you have an awesome responsibility and a wonderful one as you involve yourself in caring for your babies.

“Take the mobile off the bed, take care of their needs, and leave them alone.” This odd sentence was my introduction to Magda Gerberand the child care philosophy that would become my passion. I had given birth a few months before reading this quotation, the only one by Gerber, in an article in L.A. Parent magazine about raising a creative child.

via Magda Gerber and the Creative Child | Janet Lansbury.

Babies and children are always fascinating and sometimes frustrating to me. As a former maternal child nurse, I feel privileged to have been one of the first people to have held some newborns. I always felt that the birth of another little being was a blessing and a miracle. I think I always knew that something special had just happened when a baby was delivered.

GENERATIONS of psychologists and philosophers have believed that babies and young children were basically defective adults — irrational, egocentric and unable to think logically. The philosopher John Locke saw a baby’s mind as a blank slate, and the psychologist William James thought they lived in a “blooming, buzzing confusion.” Even today, a cursory look at babies and young children leads many to conclude that there is not much going on.

New studies, however, demonstrate that babies and very young children know, observe, explore, imagine and learn more than we would ever have thought possible. In some ways, they are smarter than adults.

via Op-Ed Contributor – Your Baby Is Smarter Than You Think – NYTimes.com.

 

Temper tantrums can be very perplexing to parents. This anecdote might help explain how RIE understands the mechanisms of toddler tantrums.

Young children are self-healing geniuses, have you noticed? Sometimes their tantrums are an expression of immediate discomforts like fatigue or hunger. Other times, however, they have a backlog of internalized feelings and will seem to deliberately and (seemingly) unreasonably push our limits so that we will hold steady and resist, which then opens up the escape valve they need to release these emotions. But this process can only work for them when we are able to set and hold limits and bravely accept their feelings.

via The Healing Power of a Toddler’s Tantrum | Janet Lansbury.

A WIC Shutdown: Here is Where You Can Get Baby Formula

Bottle Feeding

We all know that the government shutdown has caused problems for those parents receiving formula and baby food from WIC.

Jessica Lawson, the feminist mom has compiled a list by state of where to get WIC aid. It is not a complete list but it is a good resource for those in need.

Lisa Belkin published this information on Huffington Post earlier today.

I hope it is helpful!

Where To Find Formula And Baby Food During A WIC Shutdown.

Flu Season is here…will you get a Flu Shot?

Flu Shot

I will be getting a flu shot this year. It is mandated at my workplace but that is not the only reason I get vaccinated.

My personal reasons for getting a flu shot every year are:

  • asthma
  • age
  • post mitral valve repair surgery

All of the above would make a case of the flu more serious for me and I do not need a complicated case of the flu.

Fortunately for me, I have several options available as to where to get vaccinated, my doctor’s office, my workplace or Minute Clinic at CVS. I am going to Minute Clinic.

Minute Clinics are available in many areas and you can go there and easily get your Flu Shot. This year there are several options…flu mist, mini needles, or the regular shot. I choose the regular shot. As a nurse, I am not afraid of needles…never really have been.

In a few days, I will be posting about my experience at my local CVS Pharmacy and Minute Clinic, so you can see how easy it is to get vaccinated against this year’s flu.

Kids need flu vaccine too…a case of the flu can keep them out of school causing for missed work for you both…holidays are affected too…I cannot tell you how many holidays have been ruined by some crazy virus, so why take a chance with the flu?

I know vaccinations are not for everyone, this is not up for discussion with me. I vaccinate and will continue to do so. Please do not comment about my choice and I will not comment about yours.

Head over to the Minute Clinic website and learn more about what they offer as the winter and “flu and cold season” approaches,

Related posts:

Flu season is upon us: Get your kids vaccinated

 

 

Bedtime Rituals for Kids

Madeline

I sort of love rituals…it makes me feel somewhat secure to know that I do a certain thing  almost all the time and that some things are therefore predictable.

In the morning, my ritual is a cup of coffee, I am not the same person if I skip this ritual.

Orange juice at breakfast has also been a ritual for me since childhood as has been breakfast. My grandmother was a firm believer in breakfast. She made it every morning, whether we wanted it or not.

My morning ritual of coffee and breakfast is comforting and I rarely change it, I almost never skip breakfast of some sort and I never skip my coffee.

For children, rituals are also comforting and help to settle them when life hands them a chaotic moment.

A kiss from us when they fall down or a hug from us when they are crying is something that they rely on for comfort.

Bedtime rituals provide comfort at the end of a busy day. It can be very calming for a child to have us join in their bedtime routine of a bath, quiet time and reading. It is a time to help them settle down and quiet themselves. It can also be a time for us to talk with them about whatever is going on in their little heads.

The bedtime ritual of reading with my grandchild is one that I cherish.  Children’s books are wonderful and they generate such an opportunity to interact, whether it is about school, play, friends, or family. Even fairy tales have lessons to teach. The classics like Madeline and Winnie the Pooh bring back so many memories.

Life can feel so frenzied…it bothers me to see little ones lose out on story time before going off to sleep…it is a ritual that just might stay with them long into adulthood. Reading before bed can be relaxing and a way to self soothe as they did when as infants they watched their mobiles in their cribs. Soothing music goes well with bedtime too.

Honestly, after reading and music listening, I am ready for bed myself but many nights my computer beckons me to finish the business at hand. On those nights when “home” work has to get done…I feel robbed…just as I would if I did not have my coffee waiting for me in the morning.

What are some of your favorites to read with your children?

 

 

The benefits of parents reading to children are numerous, everything from stimulating a child’s cognitive, social and emotional development, to exposing them to language and storytelling, Zuckerman said. Bedtime stories also provide a special opportunity for parents and kids to interact, and create a “quieting tradition” as the child gets ready to go to sleep, he added.“Most family rituals – from families eating together to doing a variety of activities together – are declining because adults are busy and because everyone is on their machines,” Zuckerman said.

via Sweet dreams, bedtime story? Many parents skip nightly ritual – TODAY.com.

Back-to-School: Your Kids Health

back to school photo

 

I both love and loathe this time of year. I love that my kids are excited to see their friends, make new ones, meet their teachers, and have a genuine enthusiasm to learn new things. But…I loathe that the passage of time is staring me squarely in the face, declaring…yes, your kids are growing up and moving on. Get used to it.

via: Back-to-School: On keeping your kids healthy and safe all year long | Confessions of a Dr. Mom.

Back to school, as I said in my last post signals “a new beginning” which is at best bittersweet.

Given my feelings and I am apparently not alone, there are things to keep in mind that may help keep your kids healthy and safe.

My first recommendation is to get enough sleep yourself and make sure your kids get on a back to school sleep schedule and stay on it.

  • Sufficient sleep will help to keep your immune system in its finest form to help ward off the coming colds.
  • Making sure that your kids are up to date on their yearly check-ups and their immunization schedule…I am in favor of vaccinations so no need to chastise me for this.
  • Make sure all of your emergency medications are up to date at home…get rid of expired and near expired meds…make a kit with bandaids, antiseptics for cuts, cleansing cloths etc….keep it in a place that is easily reachable. You should also have one in the car.

Be aware of recommendations when it comes to OTC medications for children.

Be aware of your child’s symptoms and whether they are allergy symptoms or cold symptoms.

Check with your pediatrician if you are not sure.

As a parent or caregiver, you are in charge of your kids’ health. Now that it’s allergy season, your child may be experiencing symptoms from allergies or a common cold – that can strike year-round.

There are many over-the-counter options available to help make your child feel better when he or she has a cold or allergies, but be careful to only use a medicine that treats your child’s specific symptoms. Our “Decrypting Your Child’s Symptoms: Colds vs. Allergies” checklist can help you better understand your child’s symptoms and how to treat with care.

via Medicine Safety | OTCsafety.

Last but not least, keep your child home from school if he/she is sick. If your child has a fever he should not return to school until 24 hours after he is fever free.  

 

 

“Care Package” Wars at Sleep Away Camp

 camp

It used to be just “color war” but now it is “care package war” at sleep away camp.

Color war was a rite of passage but care packages were a comfort from home.

I am guilty of sending care packages to my kids, many years ago.

I also used a service that put together camp friendly packages…I admit this decision was a complete and total waste of money. But, I felt that I needed to compete with the other campers “care packages”… in hindsight…utterly ridiculous!

What I did not do was concoct elaborate ways to stash forbidden candy in my care packages but I did not discourage my kids from taking their own private contraband with them.

It seems that over the years camps have tried to get the upper hand when it comes to controlling care packages…some camps have banned them altogether.

For me, the jury is out on how I would deal with this if I were a parent with a child at sleep away camp this summer.

I would like to think that I would try to adhere to the camp rules.

But when my kids were at camp, I remember hating the lack of contact with them and the “care package” was something I felt I had control over.

I would probably still send one package during the 4 weeks and call it a day…and it would include contraband candy for sure!

Disclosure:

This discussion brought back memories of the difficulty of sending my kids to sleep away…it was a very emotional “letting go”both for myself and for my kids…I never went to sleep away… I am sure if my husband had not encouraged me to send our girls I would not have done so.

 

 

For as long as American children have attended summer camp (around 150 years), parents have sent them stuff. The term “care package” originated after World War II when the Cooperative for American Remittances to Europe (CARE) began sending food relief across the Atlantic. The group bought up surplus 10-in-1 food parcels from the American military, which had prepared them for an invasion of Japan.

Each package included a pound of steak and kidneys; 8 ounces of liver loaf; 12 ounces of luncheon loaf (Spam); 2 pounds of coffee; and a pound each of lard, honey, raisins and chocolate. In its first two decades, the organization delivered over 100 million packages.

Are Over-the-Top Parents Really the Rule at Summer Camp? – NYTimes.com.

Care-Package Wars – Parents Disregard Camp Bans.

Do You Wish Your Baby Had Hair?

Disclaimer: This post is not sponsored.

Your little girl does not have to be “bald” any longer.

I don’t quite know why but I find this a very cute idea for parents to actually get a glimpse of what their little girl or even boy might look like with hair.

What do you think about this?

Am I being ridiculous here, isn’t  it just a whimsical thing that should not be taken too seriously?

 

dahliadrop

Our patent pending HAIR+band accessory combination allows baby girl’s (with little or no hair at all) the opportunity to have a beautifully realistic HAIR style in a SNAP!!

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The wispy hair strands have been arranged in the cutest most adorable elfish coiffure!

Silky strands of Monofiber Kanekalon are used to create our Baby Bangs! Hair Strands. Kanekalon is the most realistic man-made hair fiber available.

What Do Your Kids Do During Summer Vacation?

ice cream cone

 

Instead, I’m choosing to teach them that breaks are a good thing. That they don’t need to wring their brain cells dry to be good students. That their hard work during the academic year deserves the reward of relaxation.

 

I’m teaching them that right now, they should experience fun and freedom and mischief and food and yes, a goodly amount of TV and video games. I’m teaching them that they are good enough, and I don’t expect perfection.

 

I’m teaching them that they’re still kids. And that’s really all they need to learn right now.

via I’m Not Teaching My Kids Anything This Summer | Summer Learning.

 

Truly…I could not say this better myself…as I stare out the windows at the water which beckons me to just go with the flow on any given day!

Summer vacation has always been a time that I valued with my kids and now I continue to value it with my grandchild.

My own Nana, God bless her, taught me that summer was for…

Days full of unscheduled activities as much as possible…

Summer was for days…

Full of ice cream cones, sandcastles, swimming and beaches along with…

Rainy days full of  painting, make-believe and cookie baking.

What better excuse to be a kid myself…

How Do You Know If You and Your Child Need a Play Date Consultant?

IMG_2674

Have you ever heard the expression that “there is nothing new under the sun”…

I was a believer in that saying, until I read about this!

Experts said that kids may need the play-date tutoring because their young lives have become so regimented, with classes in subjects like Mandarin and violin, that they don’t know how to play with others.

via Rich parents hire play-date consultants to help kids play better for private-school admissions – NYPOST.com.

Since when do children need experts to tutor them in how to successfully negotiate a play date? Has childhood really become so regimented that kids don’t know how to be kids any longer?

Or is it that parents do not know how to let kids just be kids?

Play is childhood…it is how children learn about the world and how they develop skills that they will use in day to day life. It is how they first learn to problem solve.

Watching children play is absolutely fascinating…at least in my eyes.

As a grandmother of one…I am having the time of my life…I am getting to have another chance to interact on an almost daily basis with a child. I have learned from experience with my own children “not to sweat the small stuff” that children will figure it out if left to themselves to solve a problem.

Patience and time is what I have on my side. This was not always true and I realize that it is the same for this generation of parents. Like myself, they cannot wait for their children to grow…they want them to succeed…they want them not to have to deal with all the difficulties that they dealt with as children. They want “the best” for them.

In this quest for “the best”, today’s parents may just be denying their children what is best. That is just being a child and being allowed to grow and develop through play activities and imagination.

Can trust be said enough times? Trust should be our mantra. It is the secret to the most successful parenting and also the secret to enjoying it. Trust in our child, along with the magic word “wait”, help us to stay our course when friends, family, and unenlightened professionals imply that we’re not doing enough, and/or our child isn’t keeping up. Trust will remind us to let go of personal expectations for our child and to instead recognize and support the expectations she has for herself. Trust, trust, trust. It will never lead us astray. ~ Janet via Janet Lansbury/Elevating ChildCare

 

Parenting is definitely work and that has not changed.

In many ways, it is even more difficult in today’s world to unplug, wind down, and leave the calendar open to do whatever you fancy for a day now and then.

Just perhaps parents should schedule themselves to unschedule and let themselves and their children stop and learn to play.