Everything you need to know…”I don’t think so”!

Recently, there was a post on “Babble “that described a mom’s 8 Postpartum Symptoms that she did not know existed until they happened to her…

These days, it truly baffles me how there is any thing left to know about pregnancy, delivery and postpartum with all the resources at a mom-to-be’s fingertips.  “Everything you ever wanted to know”  is merely a click away.

But…my question remains, “HOW realistic is it,  to read something called “everything you ever wanted to know” about anything that you are going to experience?

Now, I am not suggesting to be unprepared for labor and delivery, nor am I saying not to have information to read when you are pregnant …but something with the title “everything” should give any of us pause for thought.

No mom-to-be or parents-to-be need to know anywhere near “everything”.

In my professional opinion…depending upon what you choose to read, you could be driving yourself right into your first legitimate “panic attack“. Then you will have to start reading about “panic disorders” as well.

A few years ago, I had the unpleasant experience of open heart surgery…oh sure, I read, and prepared. I learned about the robotics approach and how that would prevent the need for the open chest incision…which was certainly an appealing idea.

As a nurse, who had taken care of patients after open-heart surgery I new the smaller, less invasive approach was certainly a great option, but I also knew the ultimate choice was not going to be entirely mine to make. So, I put myself in the hands of The Bluhm Cardiovascular Institute at Northwestern Memorial Hospital here in Chicago and listened carefully to what the doctors had to tell me about the condition of my mitral valve. My surgeon told me robotics would not be the best approach. At that moment, I put my entire confidence and life in his skilled and capable hands.

No, he did describe all the details of what it would be like recovering from the scariest surgery of my life…but he was confident he could repair my valve without having to give me an artificial one…but that was not a guarantee until he was actually inside my chest looking at my heart.

I will not bore you with all I did not know about  post-operative open heart recovery…but I will tell you that I am glad there was no book with the title, “Everything you want to know when you are having open-heart and valve repair surgery”.

As it was, from my own nursing experience… I knew and had seen entirely too much…I was scared, but fortunately blessed with an inner calm and peace. I had a supportive family to welcome me back from the hands of my surgeon.

I am happy that I did not know all the gory details about recovery from cardiovascular surgery, just as I was glad that I did not know all that I would experience after delivering my first child, 30+ years before. I knew enough.  Professionals, friends and family helped me muddle through those six difficult post operative weeks after heart surgery just as they did as I muddled through those six blurry postpartum weeks as a young woman years ago.

A funny thing comes to mind about these so very different life experiences…I always tell my friends when they pack for a hospital stay to bring their own pillow…it will bring them much needed comfort.

As a new mom, when I left the hospital for the 2 hour trip home with my infant daughter I used my own pillow to sit on…after heart surgery, I was given a MENDED HEART pillow…on my way home, I used that pillow to hug .

For me…I guess all I really needed to know was have a pillow handy.

8 Postpartum Symptoms I Never Knew Existed | Babys First Year Blog.

12 Essentials to put in your hospital bag…

One of my friends is having her first baby and has asked her friends what she should pack for her hospital stay.

Her question inspired me to look through my drafts and finally finish this post tonight.

So instead of my usual “Week in Review” here is my answer to Heather’s question.

Pregnancy seems to never end as it gets closer and closer to your due date…just ask any mom.

So about 4 weeks prior to your due date get out your bag and pack it for the  hospital.

It is a good thing to be prepared thus avoiding any last minute unnecessary chaos. Keep your bag handy to grab when the time comes. Some expectant moms leave their bags in the car just in case they are away from home when their water breaks.

Hospital Essentials.

My personal essentials list as a former Labor and Delivery nurse would include:

  • A nice soft pillow with a colorful pillow case for comfort and pictures.
  • Lollipops for labor, my personal favorites are Cherry Charms
  • I would probably opt for a wonderful hospital gown designed especially for new moms by Annie and Isabel (my personal favorites are the Anita and the Evelyn.

I have to digress here and mention my friends at Annie and Isabel…they are such special nurses that created these wonderful gowns to make women and soon men look and hopefully feel better while in the hospital. If I were going to be hospitalized I would certainly call on them to dress me for the occasion. Have a look see for yourself…my mom blogger friend, Jessica at Mommas Gone City knows first hand the comfort of a gown by Annie and Isabel.

  • A comfy bathrobe
  • Make-up to help me look and feel like myself
  • Baby’s car seat
  • Baby clothes
  • Some non-perishable snacks that I like to munch on…I have been in the hospital too many times and the long hours at night go well with cookies and ginger ale in my experience.
  • My cellphone to make the necessary baby announcements
  • My white noise machine to help me sleep at night if at all possible
  • My own breast pump
  • My camera for those special “Kodak” moments

This is a short clip about packing for Labor and Delivery from Today’s Moms

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/40490920#40490920

Thank you: Jessica Shyba at Mommas Gone City  and Heather soon to be mom!

 

Week in Review….Parenting in the Loop

Parenting

Links of the Week:

Internet Safety:

via InternetSafety101.

The Internet has opened up an exciting new world filled with benefits for everyone. It has also opened the door to many potential dangers for children.

Childbirth:

via Deep Fear of Childbirth Drives Some C-Sections | Healthland | TIME.com.

The mere idea of pushing a fully grown baby into the world the natural way can give even the bravest expectant mother pause. But a small number of women are so terrified of childbirth that it dramatically raises their odds of delivering by emergency or elective cesarean section, according to new research to be published in the international journal Acta Obstetricia et Gynecologica Scandinavica AOGS.

Sleep:

via Why Sleep Is the Ultimate Parental Bugaboo: Go the F— to Sleep Offers a Clue | Healthland | TIME.com.

For all the lead-up to having a baby, newborns don’t do much: eat, sleep, poop. Pooping happens without any parental intervention. Eating is a function of breast or bottle. But, ah, sweet slumber — that is the wild card.

It is a “snowy day” here in Chicago but the sun is trying to make an appearance.

Have wonderful weekend!

Doctor or Midwife? Which one is right for you?

NOTEWORTHY WEDNESDAY!

Midwife or Doctor?

Many pregnant women ask this question and the answer is not an easy one.

Let’s face it, we have all heard the ‘horror story’ labor and delivery tales. They are very frightening to the first time mom-to-be. It is a wonder any woman who has heard one of these stories chooses to get pregnant.

As a former labor and delivery nurse I surely have played a role in someone’s birth story…I hope it was one of the nice ones.

If you are planning to have a baby or are currently pregnant you may be considering going to a midwife for your prenatal care. There are a few things you need to consider;

  • Medical health: how is your general medical health and would you be considered high-risk due some underlying medical condition?
  • Approach: what type of approach do you prefer…are you looking for a practitioner that is more holistic in his/her approach?
  • Personal needs:you will need to know your own individual needs and find a practitioner who is respectful of them.
  • Setting:what kind of setting are you hoping for your labor and delivery…would you consider a birthing center or are you more inclined to want a natural delivery with options, such as epidural anesthesia, that are only available in a hospital?
  • Cost factor: what does your insurance cover … does it cover a birthing center delivery with a nurse mid-wife or a trained mid-wife home delivery.

Practitioner qualifications are sometimes confusing as well:

Obstetricians are generally board certified in obstetrics and gynecology…they are trained to deal with pregnancy, labor and delivery and any complications and emergencies that might occur. Physicians are many times waiting for a disaster to occur which is why they are quick to intervene in many cases. It is simply their focus as physicians and surgeons.

CNMs, (Certified Nurse Midwives) many times work alongside physicians…they tend to take more time with their patients; they are more apt to try measures in labor that will help to avoid use of pain medications and other interventions unless absolutely necessary. That is not to say you cannot find a physician that will do these things also.

Direct-entry midwives..they are not nurses but they are licensed and trained to deliver babies. They do home deliveries as do some CNMs.

Life is full of choices. When you are pregnant choosing the right person to take care of you during your pregnancy is extremely important…you need to feel comfortable, confident and secure in their approach and their qualifications to assist you through a healthy pregnancy and a safe delivery.

 How to find a midwife

  • American College of Nurse-Midwives operates a toll-free hotline (888/MIDWIFE) that lists CNMs in your area. For general information, call 202/728-9860; write to 818 Connecticut Ave. NW, Suite 900, Washington, DC 20006; or check out the group’s website at www.midwife.org.
  • Maternity Center Association publishes a booklet, Journey to Parenthood($6), with information on choosing a maternity-care provider. Call 212/777-5000 or Write to 281 Park Ave. South, 5th Floor, New York, NY 10010. Visit the MCA website at www.maternity.org.
  • Midwives Alliance of North America can refer you to direct-entry midwives and CNMs in your area. Call 888/923-6262 or Visit their website atwww.mana.org.
  • National Association of Childbearing Centers can provide a list of birth centers in your area, as well as information on how to select a birth center. Send a $1 donation to 3123 Gottschall Rd., Perkiomenville, PA 18074.

Should You Use a Midwife? – Parenting.com.

Doctor or midwife: Which is right for you? | BabyCenter.

http://www.acog.org/About_ACOG/News_Room/News_Releases/2011/The_American_College_of_Obstetricians_and_Gynecologists_Issues_Opinion_on_Planned_Home_Births

Natural Birth in the hospital…

Natural Birth and Hospital...can you ever have these words in the same sentence??? Can a natural birth be accomplished in a hospital setting?

In some cases, yes…but the key to accomplishing this feat is to “do your homework“. It is up to you to enable a ‘natural birth’ for yourself and your baby.

Whether or not you will be successful will be partly due to your preparation and partly due to your particular labor and your body’s and your fetus’ response to it.

It is my belief as a former Labor and Delivery nurse that every woman’s labor is unique as is their response to it. If you remember this, it will make sense for you to do your birth ‘homework’ because no one knows you like you.

You can use other mom’s experiences to help you plan what you would like your own birth experience to be. Always keep in mind that you are unique and things will happen that may throw your plan off kilter.

Homework Hints for Natural Hospital Birth:

  • Choose your obstetrical care very carefully… remember you should be aware of how your caregivers feel about ‘natural birth’. You will also need to know how their partners feel about it also. Remember to ask about what their hospital offers for women in labor. It will not help if your doctor is okay with tubs and showers during labor if they are not available at the hospital where you will be delivering. Put together a  great team…such as doctor, midwife, doula, coach/support person.
  • Take classes to learn all you can about labor and delivery … a one day class is, in my opinion, not enough…you are on overload by the time it is over. If it is the only option then by all means do it. Try to find classes to accommodate your needs…sometimes there are nurses who will do this privately if that is helpful to you. Remember, you have nine months to get ready use your time wisely and try not to procrastinate.
  • Get a good pregnancy book and use it…read it, dog ear it, discuss it with your partner. Stay away from multiple sources of information that will make you confused. Ask questions of your doctor, midwife and doula…trust them and yourself.

I just finished reading  “Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds” and I loved it! It’s written by medical anthropologist and doula, Cynthia Gabriel and it’s solidly helpful for women hoping for this kind of birth.

Home birth is not for everyone for a whole host of reasons, but some women feel they’d like to have something close to it in a hospital setting. And for those women there are strategies. This book is dedicated to that concept.

via 7 Tips for Having a Natural Hospital Birth | Being Pregnant. by Ceridwen

Oregon Plans Ban on C-Sections …

Banning early C-sections is a very interesting headline…I am not sure how hospitals in Oregon are going to actually enforce this hard line control on early, elective Cesarean sections.

Having a c-section for other than true medical necessity is never a good idea…the baby is still developing during the last weeks of pregnancy. Certainly it is not a great thing for a newborn to be shuttled off to the NICU for respiratory problems due to an early elective c-section…not to mention the added cost of the NICU care.

  • After delivery if a baby is in the NICU the bonding that is so important is difficult because mom is dealing with her own post-op pain and restrictions.
  • Breast feeding then becomes more difficult as well and cannot be established as early in the postpartum period as it generally is after a vaginal delivery.

It will be very interesting to watch how all this ‘plays out’ in Oregon and how it influences what is happening in other states as well.

Starting next week, many hospitals in Oregon will be taking a stand against early and elective Cesarean sections, MSNBC.com reports. C-sections have become commonplace, and federal statistics now show that surgical deliveries account for more than 30 percent of all U.S. deliveries.

However, Oregon officials are now working toward the goal of giving “babies more time for important development and to reduce costly complications after birth,” MSNBC reports.

Seventeen Oregon hospitals (including all nine birthing hospitals in the Portland area) are implementing a “hard stop” on these elective procedures, says the March of Dimes’ Oregon chapter, as quoted in the MSNBC report. According to a 2009 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, about 1 in 3 C-sections is performed before 39 weeks (37 to 41 weeks is considered full term).

via Oregon Plans Ban on C-Sections – Parenting on Shine.

Related post:http://parentingintheloop.wordpress.com/2011/08/23/oregon-plans-ban-on-c-sections/

Top 50 Pregnancy Blogs

Top 50 Pregnancy Blogs

Pregnancy can be quite a trip. From the first fluttering in your belly to the endless parade of minor (and major) discomforts, your mind is opened to a whole new world of bodily functions. As your body changes, your brain tries to catch up. Is this normal? What will birth be like? What’s a “boppy pillow”? And do I need one? Read More ↓

via Top 50 Pregnancy Blogs-Pregnant Chicken.

Pregnancy and Cravings…Choices…

I am a big fan of “Eat This, Not That” as well. This is a wonderful post my Amy Tara Koch even though I don’t think that some of these cravings will be satisfied by the alternatives.

Eating healthy during pregnancy and just in general is so important to mom’s overall health. We should all make an effort to ‘eat this, not that’ every day. We might not be as successful as we want to be but at least it is a place to start.

Good luck and don’t laugh at some of the alternatives to what you really crave. I like the saying…” a minute on the lips…a long time on the hips” when it comes to cravings…

I have become a huge fan of David Zincenko. His EAT THIS, NOT THAT books and appearances on TODAY SHOW brilliantly showcases how to make nutritionally superior food choices and avoid excessive caloric intake without sacrificing flavor. I especially love how he unearths saturated fat and sodium content and compares say, a Bacon Deluxe Double from Wendy’s to 42 deep fried jumbo onion rings with a Crisco chive dipping sauce. Genius. Master Z inspired me to craft a little post on how to rein in pregnancy cravings and choose healthier foods inspired by the flavor that you crave. The biggest issue? Sugar intake. Agave nectar and Stevia are stellar replacements for refined white sugar to sweeten tea, coffee, baked goods and oatmeal

via Amy Tara Koch Blog » Tame Your Cravings! Bump It Up Approved Cravings Replacement List.

http://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/eating-well/week-7/pinch-hitters.aspx