Monthly Archives: February 2012

Doctor or Midwife? Which one is right for you?

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NOTEWORTHY WEDNESDAY!

Midwife or Doctor?

Many pregnant women ask this question and the answer is not an easy one.

Let’s face it, we have all heard the ‘horror story’ labor and delivery tales. They are very frightening to the first time mom-to-be. It is a wonder any woman who has heard one of these stories chooses to get pregnant.

As a former labor and delivery nurse I surely have played a role in someone’s birth story…I hope it was one of the nice ones.

If you are planning to have a baby or are currently pregnant you may be considering going to a midwife for your prenatal care. There are a few things you need to consider;

  • Medical health: how is your general medical health and would you be considered high-risk due some underlying medical condition?
  • Approach: what type of approach do you prefer…are you looking for a practitioner that is more holistic in his/her approach?
  • Personal needs:you will need to know your own individual needs and find a practitioner who is respectful of them.
  • Setting:what kind of setting are you hoping for your labor and delivery…would you consider a birthing center or are you more inclined to want a natural delivery with options, such as epidural anesthesia, that are only available in a hospital?
  • Cost factor: what does your insurance cover … does it cover a birthing center delivery with a nurse mid-wife or a trained mid-wife home delivery.

Practitioner qualifications are sometimes confusing as well:

Obstetricians are generally board certified in obstetrics and gynecology…they are trained to deal with pregnancy, labor and delivery and any complications and emergencies that might occur. Physicians are many times waiting for a disaster to occur which is why they are quick to intervene in many cases. It is simply their focus as physicians and surgeons.

CNMs, (Certified Nurse Midwives) many times work alongside physicians…they tend to take more time with their patients; they are more apt to try measures in labor that will help to avoid use of pain medications and other interventions unless absolutely necessary. That is not to say you cannot find a physician that will do these things also.

Direct-entry midwives..they are not nurses but they are licensed and trained to deliver babies. They do home deliveries as do some CNMs.

Life is full of choices. When you are pregnant choosing the right person to take care of you during your pregnancy is extremely important…you need to feel comfortable, confident and secure in their approach and their qualifications to assist you through a healthy pregnancy and a safe delivery.

 How to find a midwife

  • American College of Nurse-Midwives operates a toll-free hotline (888/MIDWIFE) that lists CNMs in your area. For general information, call 202/728-9860; write to 818 Connecticut Ave. NW, Suite 900, Washington, DC 20006; or check out the group’s website at www.midwife.org.
  • Maternity Center Association publishes a booklet, Journey to Parenthood($6), with information on choosing a maternity-care provider. Call 212/777-5000 or Write to 281 Park Ave. South, 5th Floor, New York, NY 10010. Visit the MCA website at www.maternity.org.
  • Midwives Alliance of North America can refer you to direct-entry midwives and CNMs in your area. Call 888/923-6262 or Visit their website atwww.mana.org.
  • National Association of Childbearing Centers can provide a list of birth centers in your area, as well as information on how to select a birth center. Send a $1 donation to 3123 Gottschall Rd., Perkiomenville, PA 18074.

Should You Use a Midwife? – Parenting.com.

Doctor or midwife: Which is right for you? | BabyCenter.

http://www.acog.org/About_ACOG/News_Room/News_Releases/2011/The_American_College_of_Obstetricians_and_Gynecologists_Issues_Opinion_on_Planned_Home_Births

Week in Review for Parenting in the Loop

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Links of the week:

http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/02132012why-the-french-dont-need-parenting-books/

Druckerman can talk all she wants about the Pause, and Le cadre (the frame), and the strict adherence to meal times, but the main difference between French and American mothers is culture.

It’s not that French moms are doing everything right, but that they believe they are.

French parenting

via Why Sleep Matters to Babies and Parents | Science of Mom.

Yes, sleep deprivation is a normal part of parenting. But when babies and parents suffer from chronic sleep deprivation, we need to be seriously concerned. Babies need sleep to support healthy development. Parents need sleep to maintain sanity. Sleep is a universal human need.

via Affluent Foreign-Born Parents in N.Y. Prefer Public Schools – NYTimes.com.

Miriam and Christian Rengier, a German couple moving to New York, visited some private elementary schools in Manhattan last spring in search of a place for their son. They immediately noticed the absence of ethnic diversity, and the chauffeurs ferrying children to the door.

Happy Friday…Have a great weekend!

Preteen Vaccine Week

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California Department of Public Health Celebrates Preteen Vaccination Week!

February 12-18, 2012!

The goal of 2012’s Preteen Vaccine Week campaign is raise awareness about California’s new Tdap requirement for incoming 7thgrade students, immunization recommendations for 11-and 12-year-olds,  and promote the preteen doctor visit through multiple avenues such as schools, providers, and the media.ACIP currently recommends that 11- and 12-year-olds receive these vaccines:Tdap tetanus, diphtheria, whooping cough:

For the 2012-13 school year and beyond, all students entering 7th  grade will need proof of a

Tdap booster shot before starting school

Meningococcal

Annual flu vaccine

HPV human papillomavirus 3-shot series

A total of 2 vaccines against chickenpox varicella

via Preteen Vaccine Week.

Vaccinations are a hot topic…many parents are choosing not to vaccinate their children for various concerns that are legitimate at least in their views at the time.

  • Children depend on adults, mostly  their parents, to make decisions for them with regard to their health and well-being.
  • Vaccinations can and do prevent children from contracting many potentially fatal diseases.

Since the 50’s when polio was essentially eradicated with the  then controversial Salk vaccine, parents have been very vocal and anxious about vaccines given to their kids. In recent years, fears of a connection with the development of autism have fueled the vaccination controversy. Now, the news that a vaccine for the sexually transmitted HPV virus is recommended for young teens has stimulated another fear that this vaccination will in fact increase the numbers of teens engaging in sexual intercourse.

What ever side of this controversy you are on when it comes time for your kids to be vaccinated remember, they are innocent and are counting on you to protect them from harm.

If you feel that vaccinations should not be given to your child, for goodness sake, do all your homework and make sure you are totally aware of the consequences of some of the diseases that your child will be at risk for acquiring. Weigh the pros and cons, make sure that the risks are worth taking.

I am not a risk taker and I would not put my child at risk for these preventable childhood diseases…as a medical professional, I would do my homework and probably spread the recommended vaccinations out over a longer period of time. With my current knowledge,  I would choose to have my child immunized.

My personal feeling is this, by not vaccinating my child against potentially fatal childhood diseases I may actually be neglecting my duties as a parent and my child could die because of my neglect…but that is just my opinion.

Natural Birth in the hospital…

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Natural Birth and Hospital...can you ever have these words in the same sentence??? Can a natural birth be accomplished in a hospital setting?

In some cases, yes…but the key to accomplishing this feat is to “do your homework“. It is up to you to enable a ‘natural birth’ for yourself and your baby.

Whether or not you will be successful will be partly due to your preparation and partly due to your particular labor and your body’s and your fetus’ response to it.

It is my belief as a former Labor and Delivery nurse that every woman’s labor is unique as is their response to it. If you remember this, it will make sense for you to do your birth ‘homework’ because no one knows you like you.

You can use other mom’s experiences to help you plan what you would like your own birth experience to be. Always keep in mind that you are unique and things will happen that may throw your plan off kilter.

Homework Hints for Natural Hospital Birth:

  • Choose your obstetrical care very carefully… remember you should be aware of how your caregivers feel about ‘natural birth’. You will also need to know how their partners feel about it also. Remember to ask about what their hospital offers for women in labor. It will not help if your doctor is okay with tubs and showers during labor if they are not available at the hospital where you will be delivering. Put together a  great team…such as doctor, midwife, doula, coach/support person.
  • Take classes to learn all you can about labor and delivery … a one day class is, in my opinion, not enough…you are on overload by the time it is over. If it is the only option then by all means do it. Try to find classes to accommodate your needs…sometimes there are nurses who will do this privately if that is helpful to you. Remember, you have nine months to get ready use your time wisely and try not to procrastinate.
  • Get a good pregnancy book and use it…read it, dog ear it, discuss it with your partner. Stay away from multiple sources of information that will make you confused. Ask questions of your doctor, midwife and doula…trust them and yourself.

I just finished reading  “Natural Hospital Birth: The Best of Both Worlds” and I loved it! It’s written by medical anthropologist and doula, Cynthia Gabriel and it’s solidly helpful for women hoping for this kind of birth.

Home birth is not for everyone for a whole host of reasons, but some women feel they’d like to have something close to it in a hospital setting. And for those women there are strategies. This book is dedicated to that concept.

via 7 Tips for Having a Natural Hospital Birth | Being Pregnant. by Ceridwen

Week in Review…

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Links of the week…

Helicopter Parents Hover In The Workplace : NPR

What would you do to help your child land a job…how far would you go? Some parents go to the job interview with their kids. What do you think about helicopter parents hovering in the workplace with their kids?

New LEGO girls line is offensive, some say – latimes.com

LEGO came out with a new line of toys aimed specifically at girls…do you have any objections to LEGOs no longer being gender neutral or don’t you care one way or the other?

10 Stress Busting Strategies for Parents

I figured this one was a sure bet…young or old we can all use stress busters now and then.

HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND!

Parenting in the Loop

Listening to your kids…

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Your kids are talking…are you listening?

Listening …we all need to do more of this…so stop forming your answer when you should be listening…stop texting when you should be listening…stop talking on your cellphone when you should be listening.

You will be very surprised about what you will learn if you become a listener rather than a rapid responder…or a texting wizard.

Car rides are great places for conversations with kids or for eaves dropping on their discussions…try listening when you are in the kitchen and your kids are playing or goofing around in the adjoining room.

Walking with your little one in a stroller can stimulate some interesting verbal exchanges…make a recording if you dare.

Challenge yourself to become a listener…see what you learn…let me know what you learn. I would love to hear from you.

This post was inspired by Jessica Gottlieb‘s recent post linked below…Jessica’s blog is a must read…she has a way with words and is amazingly honest with her thoughts.

Listening | Jessica Gottlieb A Los Angeles Mom.

Nightmares and Pre-schoolers

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NOTEWORTHY WEDNESDAY!

Nightmares…

Recently we have been having problems with our resident pre-schooler…she is having nightmares, which are disturbing for her and for us. She has been an incredibly good sleeper since around 2 months old but now is having difficulty going back to sleep after waking from a nightmare in the middle of the night.

Being a good grandma and blogger…I did some research that I would like to share about children and nightmares.

Children around three years old begin to have fears …nightmares are sometimes the results of these fears and anxiety.Usually these ‘bad’ dreams wake them up during the last half of the night and sometimes it is difficult for them to return to a peaceful sleep.

“The child may dream about danger or a scary situation. Nightmares may involve disturbing themes, images, or figures such as monsters, ghosts, animals, or bad people. Loss of control and fear of injury are common themes”

Bedtime routines that are quieting without the stimulation of a scary story or television show are helpful to ward off scary dreams.

Reassurance is important…this is a time when a parent will wake with a crying child and will want to go and console him/her and listen to his/her story. Sometimes your child will want to frantically tell you about the nightmare in vivid detail but if they don’t …no need to press them.

In the morning they may want to talk again about their dream and this is a time when you can perhaps create a different ending for the story one that is not so scary…this may help ward off a recurrent dream theme.

Coping strategies can include checking around the child’s room with him /her so they know there is nothing lurking under their beds…monsters are real at this point in their young imaginations.

There are also things that you can do to help your child. Especially with younger children, a security object such as a favorite stuffed animal or a blanket can help a child feel relaxed and safe in bed. Other things that can help are leaving a low nightlight on in your child’s bedroom and teaching him relaxation techniques. Have your child imagine a relaxing scene, such as a being on the beach or watching a sunset, will help him relax after a scary dream. Children can also use their imagination to help them settle down and fall back to sleep. Have your child imagine a different ending to the nightmare, hang a dream catcher over your child’s bed which helps catch the “bad dreams,” or have your child draw pictures of his nightmare that he crumples up and throws away.

Our little one  has a magic wand that helps to ward off  ‘bad dreams’…some nights it works better than others…

Nightmares are real and scary…your presence and a big hug is above all the best reassurance for your little one that all is well especially in the middle of the night!

http://www.babycenter.com/0_nightmares-why-they-happen-and-what-to-do-about-them_67319.bc

http://children.webmd.com/guide/nightmares

http://www.sleepfoundation.org/article/ask-the-expert/children-and-bedtime-fears-and-nightmares

Castor Oil In Labor: Yuk!

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Desperate times …desperate measures…this is how I describe the use of castor oil in labor.

Back in the day, when a mom came to L & D in early labor more likely than not she was given an enema “high, hot and hellavu lot” was the non-medical term we used for this procedure. SSEs (soap suds enemas) were used to empty the bowel and stimulate labor. An added benefit was that mom did not have to worry about “pooping” during delivery.

Castor oil may or may not work…it is unpleasant tasting, the results of taking it can cause cramping and diarrhea, not a comfortable experience, especially at 40+ weeks pregnant.

Moms …check with your physician or midwife for tips on encouraging labor before resorting to this nasty choice.

Related links:

Castor Oil In Labor: Friend or Ferociously Unpleasant Hell Ride? Or Both? | Being Pregnant.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/10631825

http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/childbirth/exah2.htm

6 Tips On Being A Better Parent

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 6 Ways to Parent Better…

Sounds simple….but we all know differently…

While breezing through some articles devoted to parenting tips I began looking for a common thread.I wanted to see if there were one or two or more things that appeared on all the lists.

Consistency seemed to be a common thread that held all the lists on parenting together.

  • Being consistent in showing love…praise…conseqences for behavior
  • Being consistent with routines like meal times…bedtimes…naptimes..this makes a child feel safe and stimulates good sleeping habits.
  • Being consistent in being organized…requiring chores…instilling a routine…like making their beds…picking up toys…helping with meals.
  • Being consistent with rules and expectations…keep the rules simple and concise and make sure other family members and caregivers are doing the same. Make a list of family rules so everyone is on the same page.
  • Be a consistent listener…put away your phone…and talk…listen in the car when they are with their friends…you will be surprised at what you learn.
  • Be consistent in taking care of yourselves…so important for parents and grandparents to exercise and enjoy themselves…be a role model for your kids so that they learn to take care of themselves too. Teach them how to balance their lives…what a gift.

All of the above done with love and respect can help make parenting easier and hopefully happier… being a parent may never be easy but it can be enjoyable.