Happy Halloween-What to Do With all the Candy

Happy Halloween!!!

Halloween in the Neighborhood

The Switch Witch

I wish the “Switch Witch” had been around when my kids were little.

As Halloween approaches there is always the dilemma of what to do with all the candy. Well, here is what I am going to do this year with my granddaughter’s haul complete with a “fairy witch’s tale”.

The ‘Switch Witch’ is a nice way to “get rid” of the “Hallowe’en Haul”.

Here is how it works:

  • Your child picks some candy to eat on Hallowe’en night.
  • He then lays out the rest for the Switch Witch before he goes to bed.
  • The Switch Witch makes rounds takes the candy and leave a surprise!
  • What a great way to deal with the Halloween dilemma!

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Any suggestions as to what the “Switch Witch” should do with the candy?

halloween 2015

 

Breastfeeding…Is it Best for All?

Is Breastfeeding always best?

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Breastfeeding is a hot topic among moms and also one which can usually ignite a “mommy war” of words and guilt. Breast may in fact be best from scientific evidence which I am not here to argue or interpret.

What I know as a mom, grandma, former mother-baby nurse is this.

If a mom wants to breast feed she deserves plenty of support because breast feeding is not always as easy as it looks. In fact, it can be downright frustrating and difficult for new moms who are dealing with a myriad of changes in their lives.

Non-judgemental support is essential. If you had a positive experience breastfeeding, I am so happy for you but don’t impose your positive experience on another mom. Why? Because each mother/baby dyad is unique.

Early in my nursing career I took a LaMaze Certification with Elizabeth Bing, She was a guru of ‘LaMaze’ in NYC. Oddly to me, she was not a nurse, she was a physical therapist if I remember correctly. So in reality, she had not much experience with hands on labor and delivery and neither did many of her certification seeking students. For many students the only experience they had was their own successful ‘LaMaze’ childbirth.

At that time I had no children but I had assisted many laboring women and I had attended many deliveries. Some were great ‘LaMaze’ deliveries and others were not so much, these were the women that had epidurals, and or pain medication.

Back in the day, how a mom delivered was very judgmental, at least in NYC. Women who were taught LaMaze by Elizabeth Bing were very sad and disappointed if they gave in to medication or epidural. They were frequently devastated if they had a c-section. I felt it was my nursing responsibility to help each mom accept her childbirth experience and accept her healthy baby.

Because of my experiences prior to having my own children, I think it was easier for me to accept the facts surrounding my own childbirth stories. They were not ‘natural’, in fact one was an emergency c-section. To this day, I am grateful for a healthy child. I was simply in the right hospital at the right time. I did not choose to breastfeed for some personal and some medical reasons. With what I knew at the time this was the right choice for me and my children.

I hear so many comments about breast feeding nazi nurses that it makes me sad. A new mom should not be made to think that a nurse is pushing or demanding that she breast feed her baby. A gently approach to a new mom is so much more meaningful after just giving birth. So many times women feel that they are not in control once they step into labor and delivery and postpartum. This is ludicrous. These moms are going home with their babies. So lets quit the judgment at the Labor and Delivery door.

Here are two posts that really inspired me today.

There are truths in both writings.

Try to read them and not get judgmental.

It is kind of a test of two viewpoints.

Make up your own mind without anger and without pushing your beliefs on other moms.

Whether you breastfeed or formula feed, there’s one mantra that’s repeated over and over again: breast is best. You whisper it to yourself in the dark as the pain of those first latches washes over you, you repeat it to newly pregnant friends, and — if you use formula — you insert it into conversations as a buffer to ward off judgment from strangers. “I know breast is best,” you utter mechanically, “but these are the myriad excuses why it wasn’t right for me.

In a recent Op-Ed in the New York Times, Courtney Jung discusses new evidence that shows we’ve vastly overstated the benefits of breastfeeding, and it’s having a detrimental effect on moms. Like most new moms, Jung was bombarded with information about breastfeeding as soon as she went public with her pregnancy. Well-meaning friends offered advice and strangers inquired as to how she’d feed her baby. Her birthing class even refused to do lessons on formula feeding because it’s “against hospital regulations.”

 

Source: Increasing Evidence Proves Breast Isn’t Always ‘Best’ Scary Mommy

 

McKenna went on to say that Jung’s conclusion was wrong.”[Jung] is just plain wrong especially in light of new epigenetic studies that show in both human and nonhuman primates that breast milk significantly alters the human microbiome, setting in place, potentially, a lifetime trajectory of protections (or without it, vulnerabilities) to a variety of diseases and health in general. Moreover, how can we ignore that formula feeding is a risk factor for SIDS?”[Breast-feeding] is especially important for African-American infants whose mothers breast-feed at significantly lower rate than do whites contributing to the enormous survival disparity of black babies compared to white babies.”

 

Source: Are We Becoming Overzealous About Breast-Feeding? : 13.7: Cosmos And Culture : NPR

 

Postpartum 8 Weeks

Postpartum 8 Weeks and Baby at 8 Weeks

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It hardly seems possible that my new little grandson is almost 8 weeks old…I am sure his mom and dad can believe it since parenthood definitely takes its toll in the early weeks of adjustment especially with respect to sleep deprivation.

Fortunately their little guy has become quite the good sleeper. Surprisingly, he did his major long sleep during the night at about 6 weeks old. I remember the first time my own child slept through the night I jumped out of bed early in the morning to see if she was okay and breathed a sigh of relief to see her just arousing from a full night’s sleep. It was a milestone to celebrate!

A baby at 8 weeks is just coming into his own and starting to have longer periods of wakefulness. It is wonderful to play music and have soft conversations with him while he is feeding, having his diaper changed, getting a bath or just hanging out in mom or dad’s arms. Sooner than later he will give you a great big toothless smile that will just melt your heart.

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Postpartum is not without its long days and sometimes even longer nights for both parents. Times can get tough when parents have not had time for themselves or each other since delivery. Visitors are great but even that can get nerve wracking when home now takes on the look of scene from a Mr. Mom movie.

Moms can get overwhelmed and what is commonly known as the “baby blues” can turn into postpartum depression for some moms after a few weeks at home with a newborn. There are many reasons this happens at a time when a woman feels that she should in fact be happy that she has a normal healthy baby.

It can be a really scary time for mom when she feels overwhelmed and sad. Many times a mom won’t want to admit that she is not enjoying her baby. The guilt can be paralyzing and embarrassing .

Here are some of the signs and symptoms of PPD

Postpartum depression can begin any time during the first two months after you give birth. Symptoms may include:

 

  • Irritability or hypersensitivity
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Anxiety and worry
  • Crying or tearfulness
  • Anger
  • Negative feelings such as sadness, hopelessness, helplessness, or guilt
  • Loss of interest in activities you usually enjoy
  • Difficulty sleeping (especially returning to sleep)
  • Fatigue or exhaustion
  • Changes in appetite or eating habits
  • Headaches, stomachaches, muscle or backaches
  • Some women with PPD believe they can’t adequately care for their baby or may harm their baby.

Access Hollywood recently aired a segment about postpartum depression. Brooke Shields, Gwyneth Paltrow both suffered PPD and just a few days ago Hayden Panettiere  announced she was taking a medical leave for PPD treatment.

When Brooke Shields spoke about her PPD it was a diagnosis that many women never spoke about. They suffered in silence and were many times embarrassed by a mental health diagnosis. After all they just had a baby.

The operating word here is JUST. Having a baby, although normal is a huge undertaking both physically and emotionally. It is by no means JUST having a baby.

I am amazed and encouraged seeing mom’s mental health discussed so openly in the media and online. It is a different world than it was when I had my own children over 30+ years ago. There is no room for shame. Shame destroys lives

Postpartum Progress is another place where moms can find an enormous amount of information and support following childbirth. Katherine Stone founded her blog and has helped so many women share their experiences and in turn help themselves and other women.

This blog is a program of the national nonprofit Postpartum Progress®. We raise awareness, fight stigma and provide peer support and programming to women with maternal mental illness. To learn more about our nonprofit’s mission and all the ways we help moms and would love to help you, click here and here.

Yes having a baby is a wonderful life changing milestone. As always moms need to take care of themselves before they can take care of others including their children.

Remember to put on your oxygen mask first and then put on your child’s…you are no good to anyone without your own oxygen.

Suggested reading:Postpartum Medication Saved my Life

Parenting inthe Loop’s Weekend

Parenting in the Loop’s Weekend Reading

Fall Weekend

At this point we are in the thick of the Fall Season and the trees are peaking in their color. What better time to head to New England

This weekend we will spend sometime with our new little grandson. I cannot wait to see him smiling, something that he has learned to do since we last saw each other. My heart is bursting to see his toothless grin!

Here are my picks for the many good reads to enjoy this weekend if you have time.

Should we be giving our little girls the message that they should excuse bully boys when they tease them or call them names among other things? Should we tell our girls that this is what boys do when they “like you”? What a mixed message!

As they get older they should never accept hurtful behavior from anyone. Does this not set them up for being abused physically and emotionally?

 

“I bet he likes you.”That’s often the message when a boy teases a girl, snatches her lunch or calls her names. “He likes you. He just doesn’t know how to show it.” (It’s said of girls who do the same to boys, too, although less often.) It’s such an easy thing to say, meant to make the victim feel a little better, and sometimes it’s even true.

Last week, I attended a social work seminar about violence. It was alarming to see all the statistics about violence in homes among people of all different backgrounds. Violence does not pick and choose its victims it knows no barriers.

We must commit to breaking the cycle of violence. It is a truly complicated  and serious social problem. Abusive relationships is one place to begin.

The following post discusses abuse which can be physical or emotional. These are typical questions to ask yourself or others about abusive relationships. Sometimes a person does not even realize they are a victim of abuse.

Are you in an abusive relationship?

Ask yourself:

 

Does my partner always put me down and make me feel bad about myself?
Has my partner caused harm or pain to my body?
Does my partner threaten me, the baby, my other children or himself?
Does my partner blame me for his actions? Does he tell me it’s my own fault he hit me?
Is my partner becoming more violent as time goes on?
Has my partner promised never to hurt me again, but still does?
What can you do?

Help is available.

Call the national domestic violence hotline: (800) 799-SAFE (7233) or (800) 787-3224 TTY or 9-1-1.

 

If you have kids of a certain age and they play Minecraft, you might want to read this post on Motherlode at the New York Times. I personally was kind of shocked at how the “villagers” in this App are killed off without thought because they are seemingly expendable. What does this teach a child or anyone else playing this game?

It is an interesting perspective that is taken in this post and certainly created more questions than answers for me.

 

Don’t take this the wrong way, but I can’t figure out what you are. You appear to be human in that you have the basic human architecture (head, torso, legs, arms) and are capable of trading goods. At the same time, you all have identical blank-faced stares and extremely limited skill sets. The literacy rate in the villages, while impossible to confirm, seems exceptionally low, and I seriously doubt any of you will be able to read this letter. But I need your help.

 

Fall Weekend

I hope you all have a wonderful Fall Weekend …please take some time for yourself and enjoy the moment!

ParentingintheLoop’s Weekend

Weekend Reading:

A Fall weekend can be so busy for many of us. If you get a chance read one, two or all of the articles below.

Painted in Waterlogue: Weekend Pumpkins

Postpartum Depression

When you have a baby the last thing anyone wants to talk about is depression. But in the room alongside your beautiful, perfect baby can be the elephant, postpartum depression. There are so many reasons this can occur and moms have little control over if and when postpartum depression rears its ugly head.

Thank goodness for women, who now talk openly about their experiences with PPD. Even celebrities, such as Brooke Shields and now Hayden Panettiere have suffered and spoken about PPD in order to help other women realize they are not alone in this journey.

Let’s keep the discussion going and for anyone who needs support or information please visit Postpartum Progress. Please also be aware of anyone who may be suffering right in front of your eyes.

 

Women are so hard on themselves: we set incredibly high standards for ourselves and then beat ourselves up if life doesn’t turn out that way. While the official figures show 10 to 15% of all women will suffer from postpartum depression, that percentage only represents those who have reported suffering. Imagine what the real figure might be.According to Postpartum Progress, more women will suffer from postpartum depression and related illnesses this year than the combined number of new cases for men and women of tuberculosis, leukemia, multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s disease, Alzheimer’s disease, and epilepsy.

Source: Hayden Panettiere Opens Up About Her Struggle with Postpartum Depression

No Judgment Just Understanding

Recently, I joined the Sisterhood of Motherhood campaign from Similac. I am proud to have been part of an effort to end the mommy wars and encourage moms to STOP judging each other.

Today, I read this story about a mom who did just that. She did not judge, she simply pitched in to help a mom who was traveling on a flight with a screaming baby. Thank-you to Nyfesha Miller for being a “sister” to another mom.

Maybe this weekend you can do something simple when you see a mom struggling. Even just holding a door open can help.

When Nyfesha Miller noticed a stressed-out mama and her crying baby on her flight, she could have done what many usually do: roll her eyes, let out a sigh, and continue flipping through SkyMall. But instead, Miller decided to help — and she’s now being praised by thousands for her actions.

 

Source: Stranger Comes to Mom’s Rescue on Flight, Restores Our Faith in Humanity | Babble

Pregnancy can be an emotional time in a mom-to-be life, it is expected with all the hormonal changes that go hand in hand as a baby develops in utero. These emotions don’t always disappear after the baby is born. Postpartum is also time of huge emotional changes as well. These emotions can flip a mom into postpartum depression but for many women they find themselves crying over things that in the past were no big deal.

This post comes from a mom who labels herself as a postpartum crier.

 

I didn’t always buy into the clichés about women being emotional roller coasters due to pregnancy or postpartum hormones. After all, I was still myself during my pregnancies, albeit with a shorter temper and a fuzzier memory. Really, I thought the stereotype was one more way for people to joke about a woman’s mental state without exploring the real reason for her hurt feelings or emotional outburst. A pregnant woman’s PMS, if you will.But after my second child was born, I couldn’t deny that I had become what I previously thought was merely a sitcom-created mothering myth: a postpartum crier.

 

Source: 26 Reasons I’ve Cried Since Having a Baby Scary Mommy

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A Weekend is a great time to catch up on so many things. At times we flood ourselves with so many “to dos” that we lose touch with ourselves and those closest to us.

I hope you catch up with your family on this Fall Weekend. Spend a little time together, being grateful for the small things in your life.

See you next week!

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We Welcome a New Baby Boy!

Baby Boy is Here!

Welcome Grandson

our new little

baby boy.

we are thrilled you are here

there is no one like you

little boy.

you are amazing

you are unique.

we pray for you

we thank God for you.

we are blessed

to have

you are in our lives.

May God Watch Over You

and

Always Be At Your Side

Tiny Little One.

Baby Boy

Little Hands

 There is nothing like the birth of a child to show us the miracle that is life itself!

End the Mommy Wars Please!

Mommy Wars…No More!

This is a sponsored post. I am a Partner in the Sisterhood of Motherhood from Similac. Thanks for supporting Parenting in the Loop.

Sisterhood of Motherhood End Mommy Wars

I love social media and good discussions but when it turns to a “war” of words over how moms are raising their children I want to scream!

Instead of shunning the Mommy Wars I am trying to be part of the solution and #EndMommyWars by participating as a proud partner in Similac’s Sisterhood of Motherhood.

  • What about you all?
  • Are you sick of moms criticizing each other like I am?
  • What experiences have you had with critical moms while trying to raise your kids?

If you like you can share your Mommy Wars Story at Similac on the Similac Facebook page via a short selfie video.

Sharing and helping to let other moms know that they are not alone in their moments of happiness and struggle is to me one of the greatest advantages of social media.

So lets help each other out and share our stories! Let’s end the mommy wars with this hashtag .  #EndMommyWars!

“Share your mommy war story on the Similac Facebook page using #EndMommyWars.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cy-xB-hHHGo&feature=em-upload_owner

 

 

Step and Go Stroller Travel System by Safety 1st

This post is sponsored. Thanks for supporting Parenting in the Loop.

Step and Go Travel System by Safety 1st

 

 

Big Item of the Week...Step and Go Travel System and Stroller

by Adrienne Lavine

So excited to have a stroller delivered, a big thank you to Step and Go by Safety 1st. I could not be more pleased!  Since my baby is due in a few days it is very timely.

Step and Go Stroller

Step and Go Travel System

Even with my hands full with our bundle of joy or a bundle of his stuff, the Step and Go will be easy to open so that we can be on the move with one step of the pedal. Not only does the “travel system” open up easily but it folds and locks with only one quick pull and then it conveniently stands upright on its own in the folded position. It’s so smooth to push around and has both baby and his parents in mind with the design.

The Step and Go includes a tray with two cup holders, a roomy storage area, and a super comfortable  grip/handle to keep hands at ease while pushing it. With one click the car seat is attached to the stroller base.

The infant car seat is perfect for traveling. It has side impact protection and an infant insert that keeps baby snug as a bug and safely secure within the harness system.

The travel system from Safety First can also be easily maintained, the seat pads can be thrown into the washer and dryer for convenient cleaning…really a great thing for us moms and dads too.

Here are the features in a nutshell.

  • Step to open design. You can open it with a simple step on the pedal.
  • Side Impact Protection.
  • Adjusts as baby grows from 4-35 pounds with center front adjust harness.
  • Five different angle choices makes it easy to get the right fit for your car.
  • There is a Carry Curve handle for carry lightweight comfort.
  • Quick Click allows the seat to attach easily onto the stroller with ONE click.

Keeping in contact with our baby will be easy through the large peekaboo window in the large hood which also has an extendable sun visor to keep baby protected from the harmful rays of the sun.

Daddy-to-be along with me and our son are excited for the ease of the Step and Go mobility with the least amount of hassle. Our son will be riding in style whether in the car or in town in his Capri colored Step and Go Travel System.

IMG_7148Thanks Step and Go from Safety First for providing this travel system to us.

We are currently on “baby watch” so it will not be long before our son will be enjoying this great stroller travel system with us!

P.S. The Grandparents are really excited about the Step and Go too…it is so easy even they can manage it…great for when they babysit.

This post was sponsored by Safety First and we were given a Step and Go Travel System for review purposes. As always all opinions are our own.

Parenting in the Loop’s Weekend

Weekend Reading from the Parenting in the Loop

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This week I have been at the “beach” house in Rhode Island. We are heading into a somewhat rainy few days so hopefully I can catch up on some reading and writing while sitting and spending time with my pregnant daughter and her husband as they prepare for their first baby.

It is officially a “baby” watch weekend  for us…my daughter’s due date is September 1st and we have already made one trip to the hospital this week in the wee hours of the morning for false labor.

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“Baby Watch”…

 

My thoughts have been racing this week and when that happens one of the ways I calm and comfort myself is to cook. Preparing  a good dinner is my way of comforting and loving my family. Enjoying a good meal at the end of the day allows the family to relax and enjoy each other while sharing some really delicious food around the table of plenty.

So today, I am posting some favorites of mine related to creating recipes and involving children in the preparation. Kids are natural creators. Food and the kitchen go together to fuel their creativity.

Weekend foods

Taco Tuesday

I have chosen this post from Motherlode because if you link to it you will see a very short video of a smiling child making “Chermoula” a Middle Eastern pesto which I have never tasted. You can also follow Kids in the Kitchen and get your own ideas for involving the children in cooking adventures during the weekend.

The master plan? Raising children who can be independent in the kitchen, able to prepare a few healthy meals and snacks and with the confidence to tackle a new recipe or task. In our Kids in the Kitchen series, Motherlode’s KJ Dell’Antonia and Cooking’s Margaux Laskey move their very differently aged families toward that goal. Margaux finds ways for her 3-year-old and toddler to help cook, while KJ stands back and coaches her two 9-year-olds and her 11- and 14-year-olds in cooking on their own.

Source: Kids in the Kitchen: Broiled Fish With Chermoula – The New York Times

What better food to share but a loaf of bread. Make this easy one with your children and enjoy the fruits of your effort together with some butter and jam.

Who wouldn’t want children who can be independent in the kitchen, able to prepare a few healthy meals and snacks and with the confidence to tackle a new recipe or task? In our Kids in the Kitchen series, Motherlode’s KJ Dell’Antonia and Cooking’s Margaux Laskey work toward that long term goal with their very differently aged families. Margaux finds ways for her 3-year-old and toddler to help cook, while KJ stands back and coaches her two 9-year-olds and her 11 and 14-year-olds in cooking on their own. This week, both families tried simple bread-making. KJ: Us

Source: Kids in the Kitchen: No-Knead Bread for All Ages – The New York Times

I was so happy for this weekend find on the cookbook shelves at Eataly here in Chicago. It is an authentically good source for Italian food geared for kids and adults alike.It is not finger foods made easy but a real Italian recipe book anyone can enjoy.

Weekend Reading

Silver Spoon for Children

 

Review: The Silver Spoon for Children – Favorite Italian Recipes January 31, 2010 in Uncategorized We got this cookbook for our eight year old for Christmas. Till today, we had only used the pizza recipe and we mainly took the lazy route and bought pre-made pizza dough. That did not test the quality of the book too much. Today, we embarked on a two-hour extravaganza and made gnocchi with tomato sauce and an orange cake. We used canned tomatoes but, apart from that shortcut, we made everything else from scratch. It was a huge success. The gnocchi tasted totally authentic. It was really fun to make them, much easier than fresh egg pasta. The potato and flour combination has the same consistency as play dough. You roll it into a thin sausage and chop it into gnocchi. It’s perfect for all age groups. I think we had a first all family cooking epiphany with the four-year old to the four+ year olds working together like a fairly well-oiled machine. Gnocchi cook really quickly and you have to scoop them out as soon as they float to the top. We made enough to freeze half of them for a future dinner.

weekend reading

Source: Review: The Silver Spoon for Children – Favorite Italian Recipes | Cheap Talk

The Silver Spoon for Children

I hope you all have a great weekend!

Wherever you are stop for a moment of gratitude…

Weekend Reading from Parenting in the Loop

Weekend Reading from ParentingintheLoop!

summer weekend

Welcome to the Friday.

Here in Chicago it is the weekend of the Air and Water Show, which is spectacular. It seems the weather is going to cooperate and the Blue Angels will be in the air.

I am a partner in Similac’s #SisterhoodofMotherhood. It is an initiative that is near and dear to me even as a grandmother. I have included my post and my friend Annie Stowe’s post.

Please help to end the Mommy Wars!

How can we stop the “mommy wars”? Realize that we are all in this together. Support initiatives like the Sisterhood of Motherhood Visit the Sisterhood of Motherhood Facebook page and share what you will do to help end the “mommy wars”. Unite, Nourish and Support all moms. Make #SisterhoodUnite your motto.

Source: Mothers all in this Together #SisterhoodUnite

Sometimes it’s just a look. Sometimes it’s words. Sometimes it’s gossip. No matter what it is or who is taking the brunt of the joke or the comment, it hurts. We seem to be victims of it, yet we still seem to do it ourselves over and over again. We judge. We criticize. We give the looks.

Source: Motherhood: Let’s Stop Judging | Stowed Stuff

Another initiative in August is #Blogust. It helps to provide Vaccines to children in underprivileged parts of the world. Heather Spohr shares her heart on her blog and helps this wonderful cause

I try to use my heartbreak to help others. Sometimes that means channeling my hurt into fundraising, sometimes it means I’m helping to raise awareness, and other times it’s to help make people feel less alone. Sometimes, the person who feels less alone is me. It’s my hope that as I navigate this tricky life, I can help those who follow along behind me feel a little bit more normal.

The Spohrs are Multiplying

Summer should afford us some time to relax and rest from the hectic pace that we keep during other times of the year especially during holiday season. As the warm weather weekend season comes quietly to a close, I welcome some schedule to my days but not the chaos that sometimes follows on its heels. The cool crisp air will be here all too quickly.

So….

as August wanes so does the summer. So lets enjoy this lazy summer weekend!